Book Review: My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh
You won’t like the protagonist but you’d still read this one, non-stop, just wishing a happy ending (or a start xD) for her!
I usually don’t read contemporary books, but this one didn’t feel like a normal book dealing with normal (day-to-day) situations. The book painted a complex world with complex characters and complex scenarios. This is the definition of “weird, but in a good way.”
To put it in brief, the book is about a young girl — smart and beautiful — who decides to take a break from mundane tasks, locks herself in a room and sleeps for an entire year. Yes, that’s it. That’s what those 304 pages try to capture .
However, there’re more perspectives to these actions — thoughts, (internal and external) conflicts, experiences, circumstances, people, relationships, feelings: depression, anxiety, lonelinesses — that initiate them in the first place. A web of these elements seems to envelop the protagonist till she can’t take it anymore and decides to spin herself a cocoon and doze off.
This young girl is smart (she’s a Columbia grad, living in New York City aka the-best-city-to-live-in), she’s rich (has inherited a lot from her parents) but her relationships keep disappointing her — a mother who was too young and troubled to give her the attention and care she needed as a child, a nonchalant father who’s introvertedness made him shut out his own kid from his life, a friend who liked her and stuck by her but had her own issues (and was likely loyal to her only because of her rich inheritance), a (on-and-off) boyfriend who was clearly not interested in having a serious future with her. And the most pertinent to note is — the protagonist and her relationship with herself, the most messy relationship in her life (the most probable cause of her zillion life troubles?).
But if I were to put myself in her shoes, it seems all understandable, if not justified. The girl has never had a pleasant relationship with anyone, starting from her childhood. And while “free will”, “happiness is a choice” etc. are credible points against her, I do personally think humans, being the social creatures we are, need society — at least to a certain extent.
A good upbringing and childhood experience does wonders to a child’s future; and by “good”, I’m not referring to world-class amenities, luxurious house, sprawling wealth, glitz-glam etc etc.; rather, “good” for a child just means supportive and loving parents, and meaningful friendships. For sometimes, we just need a shoulder to rest our head on, a hand to hold our shaking ones, a tight embrace to squeeze the sadness away! These have a great bearing on our world/ life outlook. Many who are deprived of basic human connections either end up in prisons or rehabs. Hence, I can’t help but feel sympathetic towards this young girl.
The girl is not sure about her future and nor does she take an active interest in find out where her passion might lie. Though she does give hints in the book, that she does take a certain level of interest in the Creative Arts, she’ doesn’t act on that intrigue. She contents herself with a non-technical job at a museum. Maybe ambition and passion could have been her cure.
“Being pretty only kept me trapped in a world that valued looks above all else.”
Her friend Reva is another character whose actions I don’t completely agree with but do understand — a girl from a poor background finding herself amidst the glitz and glam of New York City; she aspires for a wealthy future and a good relationship but often finds herself out of place. The solution — she decides to dress herself up in fake replicas of big brand accessories, puts on pompous makeup and follows diet fads to convey that she belongs. [A moment’s silence for what many in society have come to value.] [I do not think luxury is bad, but what i do think is bad is — the tendency to judge a person’s value based on his/her financial value, luxurious lifestyle.]
Regardless of whether her feelings are genuine or superficial (I personally thought they were superficial while reading the initial chapters of the book but as the story developed, I started getting an inkling that her feelings might actually be genuine; though I still harbour mixed feelings) towards the protagonist. As far as the protagonist’s opinion is concerned, she considers Reva as a nuisance in her plan of excluding herself from everyone, nor does she think too highly of Reva as a friend. In the instances that it seems she may be concerned and appreciative of her friendship with Reva, most of the time — some serendipitous strokes of events put her in that spot rather than deliberate actions. (Spoiler alert: Recall the time she attends the funeral for Reva’s mother with no actual intentions of doing it; she just happens to be at the right place due to her delirious state post a drug overdose.)
Another peculiar character in the book is her boyfriend, Trevor. He didn’t care for the protagonist and their relationship revolved around sex alone. It would bewilder me at times as to why the protagonist in moments of deepest sorrow would keep going back to or keep yearning for this man, who was clearly dating someone else, when the book starts. But overtime, it all did make a little sense — the woman was lonely. She wanted some connection, even if it was sexual. She wanted to feel wanted, liked, even loved. Touched, felt.
However, had I been in her place, I don’t think I would have preferred such a stance or outlook. There were clearly moments in the book when the narrator just trampled her self-worth and respect for just physical connections; her desperate yearnings for pleasure. I’d mentally shout at the pages and ask why, why would a smart, beautiful woman just act submissive to a man who clearly undermined her. Perhaps, one pain helped subdue/ overshadow another? When you can’t heal one would, try inflicting another one in order to forget about the previous one?
Past experiences really do impact a person’s outlook.
[Spoiler Alert] The year of rest and relaxation — or the year of sleep and exclusion — in the end did clear her mind and gave her a new outlook on life and adversities, but the narrator doesn’t really dive deep into the evolving thought process. She’s just shown to have risen up better. It just happens; holed up in a white confined space with bouts of drug- induced euphorias, something snaps and the narrator finds herself. I would have loved to see her thought process evolve; but regardless, the stillness, the time-out to look in(side her), all helped her to untangle the knots of her past, clear her mind and start again. It gave her enough time to drill down on each bothersome thought and assuage it. She rose up!
Throughout the book, Ottessa’s writing is fluid and captivating — a simple expression of a complex world. The story does strike a chord and I strongly recommend everyone to give it a read! It’s complexity and open-endedness will perhaps give you ample opportunities to reflect upon various facets of your own life too!
Hi! Hope you enjoyed reading the review!
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Thankyou!
