Living with Feelings of Regret
We never know when a day may be someone’s last
“Mom!” my daughter wept into the phone, “Uncle Bob died today!”
It was October 1st, and I was about to walk out the door to meet a friend for coffee. It was a shock to hear the news that my former brother-in-law had passed away at the age of 79, although I knew he’d had health problems. I couldn’t process my emotions immediately, but I knew I would feel them deeply when I had the time, space, and privacy.
The Celebration of Life was October 7, 2021, over 2,000 miles away. With my own health challenges, it would have been too difficult and complicated for me to be there. My daughter kindly offered to read whatever I’d want to write about him at the memorial, so I accepted her offer and wrote the following memories about him:
In the days long before the internet and Google, Bob was the main person I knew who took their place and saved me a trip to the library for research. I knew I could ask him questions about nearly anything and the likelihood was that he’d have the answer. While his answers would usually be detailed — sometimes more than I wanted — I could always count on them being thorough and accurate.
But I want to also talk about Bob the man and friend. Peter (my then-boyfriend) and I spent many weekend…
