Member-only story

My Accidental Run-In With the Scientology Headquarters

It was as weird as you could expect

Sean Kernan
Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs
6 min readAug 8, 2024

--

Unsplash Images via Max Harlynking

It is almost a cliche to make fun of Scientology, mostly because they make it so easy. The Onion has skewered them repeatedly, with headlines like, “Scientology Losing Ground To Fictionology”.

I have a unique perspective on this because I live near their global headquarters in Tampa Bay. Last week, I visited it accidentally and realized there’s only one small thing separating them from a normal religion.

First, it gets quiet

I was driving across the Howard Franklin Bridge, enjoying the scenic view of Tampa Bay’s shimmering blue waters. I intended to have a simple, fun day with the spouse near the water, checking out stores.

We parked and began exploring. As we crossed a sidewalk downtown, surrounded by tall buildings, I said to Laura, “Why is it suddenly so quiet? That’s weird.”

She glanced around and said, “It is weird. Did we scare everyone off?”

“This has a strange post-apocalyptic abandoned town feel. Maybe we are in a movie?” I said.

“What’s it called?” Laura said.

“The Day After,” I said with authoritative finality.

--

--

Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs
Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs

Published in Bouncin’ and Behavin’ Blogs

We publish stories that make you think and humorous blogs. Topics range from politics to social justice, LGBTQ, mental health, family, humor, and entertainment. Each story covers a minimum of 3 minutes to read.

Sean Kernan
Sean Kernan

Written by Sean Kernan

All my articles are 100% human. No AI involved. Also, I'm a nommer. Submit to my publication Corporate Underbelly and I'll try to help you get boosted.

Responses (11)