Member-only story
AGING/HUMOR
Readers Are for Old People
I’m officially old
Ah, reading glasses. I both love them and hate them.
I grew up bespectacled, an injury caused by a very high fever as an infant. I endured taunting from my peers for being “four-eyed.” Sometime in my tweens, however, I grew out of this need. I considered it a bonafide miracle.
In these younger years, I quietly made fun of older ladies with their spectacles tethered to their necks with chains. Sometimes adorned with beads, these glasses necklaces were certainly practical, but definitely marked one as old.
I smugly believed my need for glasses was over, but age is my nemesis. My face may seem young, but my eyes tell a completely different story.
I can’t recall exactly when I donned my first pair of readers. Perhaps it was when my job required me to chart on a teeny, tiny iPod 4. My thirty-something eyes begged for mercy. With the readers, I could stop struggling to see the screen, improving my efficiency with documentation.
My necessary piles of glasses grew as my eyes aged. Now in my 50s, I have them stashed everywhere. On my…