The #1 surprising kickass code for success, Part 1
The Truth About Men’s Commitment Phobia Many Women Don’t Know
This secret is why you shouldn’t be a guilt-free flirt with time
The secret code of commitment.
Over centuries the boys club has preserved this secret well. It is a code most men won't kiss and tell.
The secret code of commitment is the unnecessary reason many a woman’s heart breaks. If you only knew this code you will see dating with fresh pairs of eyes.
Of course, you knowing the code may not suit him fine. He wants you to believe he is a Casanova. By believing that, you give him an ego boost. In a World that can sometimes be harsh, a lie that props fragile egos from time to time is better than the truth. He appears to have his choice of women. Result- his currency in the dating market rises many notches. ‘There’s something about Mario’ you think.
Bonus he hadn’t expected. You may even start to chase him.
For him, the Casanova image has a big win written all over it, my dear gal pal nursing a broken heart & shreds of ego.
Shhh..the big reveal!
The secret is out! The big dope. The truth about why men don’t commit easily.
Men have figured out the advantage of non- commitment while women mostly haven’t. Men are taught to look out for themselves & women are taught to look out for others. That may be why men get by with the playboy ploy.
Men use the same secret code of commitment as a kicker ingredient in their success broth. On the other hand, not recognizing this code keeps us, women, from getting what we want.
The truth is…
Commitment implies sacrifice. When a man commits to one woman, he is conscious that he has to give up on other great women. He takes his time, dating many lovesick Violets before zeroing down on his Venus. To the World, he is the playboy Hugh Hefner envies. It suits him fine. Like I said, image.
We women don’t understand this. We are waiting to commit! And when we commit don’t the man & his interests take over our life? Aren’t we more bothered about his dog’s earache than the looming deadline at work?
We want to blend into his life. We’ve been conditioned to. The man on the other hand looks for the mirror image. A woman who blends into him. The more similarities he sees the better the woman as a prospect.
It boils down to this in the dating world.
He is being indecisive. He is being flighty not because he has choices. It is because he is not in tune with himself & his emotions. He wants to be 100% certain about a woman. In the meantime, he uses the playboy image to have some fun.
The more well acquainted with himself and his emotions, the faster he commits. Because he then knows what he wants. The uncertain Romeos generally take longer.
Now you know it was never you.
You were never the problem. Also, you probably don’t want the indecisive type. Now that we’ve set that aside & got you your peace of mind back, consider this.
The man is willing to sacrifice his dating life to the ‘right’ woman. But the code of commitment reasoning goes deeper. For it is not only the dating life he sacrifices now, does he?
We humans have to divide our 24 hours among all this stuff that matters.
Commitment will take up a huge chunk of time.
This means when we commit we have to sacrifice more than just the fun of dating. No matter we are men or women we have to relegate to second place:
- Our freedom.
- Time we spend with friends
- Mobility (especially when long-term commitment is involved)
- The joy of spending our money unquestioned
- Wanton partying
- Hobbies
The thing that surprises me the most & will surprise you too is that World over women lose more in long-term commitment than men do. (Is Marriage Worth It for Women? | Psychology Today).
Yet it is the man who is more aware of the sacrifices that go into commitment. We women seem to have difficulty grasping this concept. That we shouldn’t let go of our life unless the ‘right’ man comes along.
In fact, don’t we women have a tendency to jump the gun & commit to the wrong kind of fella? Maybe because we are conditioned to place commitment above all else. Or maybe we just fall in love easier 😊
Personally, I think the reason we fall into commitments easily is more complex. A combination of conditioning, social pressure to ‘settle down, and a bit of naivete.
But wait, if you’ve been reading the headline, the kicker promised you that this line of reasoning is also the code to success.
The obvious in this article. Part 2 follows with some deeper stuff. The obvious is success in relationships. When you see a man taking time to commit, you need not hang around waiting. Find your own mojo sister. Date other men so you can try a bit of ‘casanova-ing’ too.
If that’s not your style get moving with your life. The more you fall in love with your life, the better your chances of finding the ‘right’ man.
