Gig Life | ADHD

30+ Things To Do When DoorDash is Dead

I’m just waiting for the Big Red Button to say Dash Now.

Photo by alan King on Unsplash

It’s 5 pm on Wednesday and I need cash. Even dull gig work pays some of the bills.

What do I do in the meantime?

1. Sit down on the couch.
2. Close and reopen the Dasher app, trying to refresh my request to the job gods. I implore, I’ll even accept Burger King! No response.
3. Close and reopen Dasher again. Still nothing.
4. Get distracted by an alert from MyChart for an overdue medical bill.
5. Say to myself, Damn, I gotta work today.
6. Open an Instagram message from my brother.
7. Watch a cat wearing tiny red mittens bang on a drum on repeat for three minutes.
8. See that I’ve lost 8 more minutes daydreaming about teaching my cats how to drum.
9. Pet the golden retriever snoring beside me.
10. Ask myself, What would the dog play? Ukulele? Synthesizer? Whatever it is, he’d definitely need sunglasses.
11. Walk around the house looking for my sunglasses.
12. Forget what I was looking for and curse my ADHD.
13. Open Dasher again. Nothing.
14. Close and reopen the app. I swear the Dash Map was red for a split second.
15. Tap the Big Red Button but it takes me to the Schedule page. Dang it, too slow. Nothing available till 12 am.
16. Look up dog sunglasses large breed on Amazon. The coolest ones are $16. Add them to the cart.
17. Consider taking the midnight time slot. After all, it’s work, right? Gotta pay for those doggie shades somehow.
18. My stomach grumbles.
19. Remind myself why I don’t drive around strange neighborhoods at midnight.
20. Close Dasher.
21. Check Uber Eats.
22. Realize I opened Uber Eats, the food ordering app, instead of Uber Driver, the gig app.
23. Scroll through pictures of food from the local burrito place.
24. See that it’s 5:30 and place an order.
25. Fall asleep on the couch until my phone buzzes.
26. Look at my phone half asleep and think, Is that a picture of my porch?
27. Yell loud enough to wake up the dog, Who’s sending me pictures of my porch?
28. The dog barks. Good boy, I say. You definitely get sunglasses now.
29. Notice the picture shows a takeout bag by my door.
30. Open my door and retrieve the bag.
31. Look inside the bag to make sure it’s not dog poo.
32. Add a ten-dollar tip for the driver because I know how hard the Gig Life can be.
33. Open Amazon and tap the Checkout button to purchase the dog some sunglasses.
34. Amazon says, Your card has been declined.
35. Open Dasher and schedule myself for midnight.
36. Open Medium and write this story to get some extra cash.

Photo by Kenny Eliason on Unsplash