LET ME EAT CAKE
Why I Love My Birthday
Which happens to be today
Today, April 9, is my birthday. I’ve always enjoyed celebrating my birthday, but over the past decade, I have grown to love this day.
As someone who lived with active suicidal ideation for many years, and attempted suicide twice, my birthday is a big deal for me. Today reminds me how far I’ve come, how hard I fought, and how hard I keep fighting. Today reminds me that I am strong.
I love my birthday because I didn’t believe I would live this long. I never thought I would be approaching my 20th wedding anniversary, I never thought I would be a good mom, I never thought I would be a grandmother. My brain told me over and over that I would be dead before I turned 30.
But here I am. Here I am with my smile lines, my crow’s feet, my silver hair, and my cellulite, and I’m so happy.
I know there are a lot of people who live with depression. Whose brains tell them the same lies my brain told me. I want you to read this next part carefully.
You deserve to live. You deserve to be loved. You deserve to celebrate as many birthdays as you can. You deserve cake and balloons and hugs and smooches and presents. You deserve life.
I promise you it can get better. You’ll have to work your butt off, and you might have to take medication. That’s okay. Stay with us.
If you want to help me celebrate my birthday today, celebrate yourself. Tell me something amazing about you. And I’ll celebrate with you.
