Flippered therapists
Flipping Out With Flipper
What the flip?!? Of all the forms of therapy available to us, why isn’t this the one and only one? Would we even need anything else? What is better than getting to swim with a laughing chirping dolphin? I ask you
They call him Flipper, Flipper, faster than lightning, No one you see, is smarter than he. And we know Flipper, lives in a world full of wonder, Flying there-under, under the sea!
We have therapy dolphins. Oh yes.
They exist…
My first thought was, “I want one”.
Oh yes. It would be my emotional support animal.
I would totally get an emotional support dolphin and yes, I’m bringing it to work as well. Whenever someone pisses me off or rubs me the wrong way, I run to my emotional support dolphin 🐬 who’s always happy to see me and lend me a helping flipper. Hey, it beats the violent alternative. I’m just trying to save my coworker’s lives here.
I’m all about solutions.
In all reality, the effectiveness of dolphin therapy is dubious at best. It seems nothing more than a cynical cash grab than anything else. Also, it gets people to spend thousands of dollars for an experience that could have been better spent getting actual help from actual professionals.
What’s the difference between this and a regular dolphin petting zoo? These three words: DAT.
Dolphin Assisted Therapy.
Literally.
Let’s say that the average price to go swimming with the dolphins is anywhere between three hundred to five hundred and fifty. DAT will run you four thousand to six thousand seven hundred and eighty dollars.
Those three words magically “raise the value” of the dolphin petting experience by hundreds of dollars.
Since 1996, Dolphin-Assisted CranioSacral Therapy is the use of “curing” using the high pitch and frequency the dolphins emit. I mean, if that’s all you need, you should check out Mariah Carey who can literally sing out notes as high as a dolphin.
Who knew Mariah was wasting her life with all that ridiculous singing when she could have been saving the world this whole time through the power of Dolphin chirping?
Oh and here’s more Mariah Carey with dolphins in Australia just because you don’t have enough Mariah Carey with dolphins in your life.
Oh, and they’re used in live births in the ocean as well because of course, they are. Dolphins have nothing better to do than to be traumatized by being forced to endure being subjected to watching human live births I guess. Haven’t we put the animal kingdom through enough? Why are we doing this to them?😂
“Would you do DAT if you had the money and the chance to”?
DO NOT MAKE ME ANSWER THAT!
Imagine my shock and horror to see dolphins exploited like that so that these businesses could charge hundreds of dollars more per session than you would spend at SeaWorld.
I was flabbergasted and flustered to find out the fabulous facade using our flippered friends feloniously featured in such a fiendish fishy manner.
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Upledger:
Dolphin Therapy
Mariah Carey swimming and singing with dolphins
Mariah Carey in Melbourne/Perth
