Cloney, the Tiniest Puppy

The fantastical adventure of the smol kind.

Cloney, being adorable.

Once upon a time, there was an adorable puppy named Cloney,

Cloney was the tiniest a puppy could be.

He was so tiny that none of the dogs even knew he was there.

Cloney was lonely.

Cloney, feeling the crushing weight of loneliness

Luckily, Cloney was a very clever puppy and had an idea.

“I know!”, said Cloney, “I’ll just make another puppy, and then I’ll have a friend!”

So Cloney made a puppy friend.

(It was a little weird)

Cloney (left) and Cloney (right)

When he was finished there was another puppy just like Cloney!

“I’m Cloney!” said the new puppy.

Cloney nodded sagely, setting a bad precedent.

So Cloney played and Cloney played.

“I wish we had another friend.” said Cloney.

“If we made another, there’d be three of us!”

Cloney’s idea of what three Cloneys would be like

“That makes absolutely no sense,” said Cloney dismissively.

“What if we EACH made a friend” Cloney offered adorably.

Cloney loved the idea very much, and so they set to work.

(It was twice as weird)

Cloney, with Cloney, Cloney, and Cloney.

“Hi! I’m Cloney!” said the new friends.

And they played and played and played and played.

After a lot of playing it started to get crowded.

Cloneys pondering their future

“What if we became more than a disorganized mob of puppies?” Cloney asked.

“Nah,” replied Cloneys.

Cloney was seriously embarrassed, and all the other Cloneys started to stare

There was a long pause with lots of fidgeting and a little more crowding

A perfectly normal amount of Cloneys

“Maybe we can find somewhere new to play!” said Cloney in desperation.

“Oh yes, that sounds so much better” replied Cloneys

Cloney is still a little embarrassed and doesn’t want you to stare at him

Cloney, who had long suffered from social anxiety, was the most relieved puppy ever.

So Cloney looked and Cloneys looked.

Cloneys beginning their mission-quest-thing

“I see a way!” said Cloney!

“Where?” said Cloney

Cloney looked, and Cloney saw a way…

Aww. Seriously how can you not love these guys?

Many were lost and the journey was arduous, but eventually Cloney discovered bridges to new lands

And so began the Apuppyacolypse.

Wagnarock

Cloney is very old, but this is not Cloney.

Cloney is very smol, but this is not Cloney

Cloney is very many, but this is not Cloney

This is Cloney

A scientist’s rendition of several Cloneys

Cloney is more conventionally known as the ‘Canine Transmissible Venereal Tumor’, or CTVT for short. I’d reread that sentence before looking for more images.

The dog that was Cloney died thousands of years ago. Cloney is the last of an ancient lineage that has managed to live on to this day.

Cloney isn’t the only one of his kind. There are at least three more that are found all over the world. One infects Syrian Hamsters, one swims from Clam to Clam, and the third is busy doing a serious number on the more conventionally multiceullar members of the Tasmanian Devil population

Those, of course, are just the ones that are very, very good at jumping from host to host.

For all you know, that cough you have is literally Steve from Accounting.

If you’d like to know more about Cloney and friends, Hank and the Scishow team have you covered. They’re awesome.

This is an update to an older article with images made using Midjourney. All prompts and source images here: https://www.midjourney.com/app/users/123517418172579840/
Actual science picture of CTVT by Joel Mills