The First Time I Had Anal Sex Was With the Wrong Person
But I won’t make that mistake again
There’s something incredibly intimate about anal sex, maybe that it’s naughty and only discussed in certain circles. Certainly not a topic to come up in polite conversation.
I’m not sure why we are uncomfortable with anal sex. Perhaps it’s because it’s only recently become vogue. There’s something very primal about it.
I can’t remember the first time I heard of anal sex. It took little to let my imagination run with it. I fantasized about what that kind of sex would be like. I imagined it would feel like being desired and possessed all at once. Your lover would consume you with deep penetration, and the two of you would merge in blissful pleasure.
And over time, anal sex became a part of my sexual fantasy. I wanted to be taken entirely by someone orally, vaginally, and anally. It seemed like the ultimate expression of possession. In that experience, we would see and know each other — he would become mine and me, his.
For the longest time, I was too scared to ask my husband to try it with me. Though we had been married thirty-one years, I never found the courage to suggest we venture into this unknown territory.
