8 Things I Learned From Crying Everyday For a Month

1.Crying will not always be easy.

-It is important to remember that in order to complete this body cleanse, you may have to force yourself to cry. Poking your cornea may jumpstart this process.

2.People will look at you if you cry in Starbucks.

-Do not give up. You must persevere. The haters at Starbucks don’t want you to grow and cry. They only care about themselves, and writing.

3.You will be asked if you’re ok.

-Yes you’re ok, you’re just on the emotional rollercoaster that is life and are doing a little cry cleanse. It’s like yoga.

4.Your friends will slowly disappear from your life.

-You don’t need them anyway. They were not as enlightened as you will soon be.

5.You will feel sad all the time resulting in an endless cycle of depression and despair.

-Only a side effect of the crying. Carry on.

6.The police will show up at your door from time to time.

-Your neighbors have been filing noise complaints. You can use this as fodder for your crying or simply move to more muted muffled crying.

7.You will purchase 3 cats and are already planning for another 4.

-No you’re not a crazy cat person. You just like the company. Teach them to howl and cry and you will soon be reaping huge rewards.

8.You will be a written a prescription for Xanax.

-Congratulations!

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