“Humanity Trumps Gender”: Why All Feminism is Necessary
I am angry. I feel like screaming out from on top of the roof; I am that angry. I recently read a post by Mike Essig where he rightly said ‘humanity trumps gender’. And I got mad because it doesn’t. Humanity should trump gender. But it doesn’t. I feel like a women first, a person later. I feel my womanness is thrust in my face repeatedly. And my humanness just forms the background to it.
And you know what? It cannot be any other way. Because gender is such an axis in society that it does matter too much, more than it should. Seeing society from a post-gender lens would be so freeing. But it would also be naive. Because we haven’t reached there yet. So now its not even about letting gender define you, its about recognising how you are being defined by your gender. I don’t want to feel like a women first and a person second. But the fact that I do just means I am tuned in to the reality of this world.
At the same time, I cannot give into this feeling of being a women first and a person second. I have to fight it. I have to talk about it so others fight it. So that some day, humanity does trump gender. And being a person matters more than having or not having certain body parts.
The fact that my gender tended to trump most things came in to sharp focus in college when I joined a Ultimate frisbee team which was a mixed team (women and men played together). I felt my identity as a women always came before my identity as a player. When I joined another club team, this problem persisted. One of the female coaches rounded us women players and told us that there were two aspects to the fact that we didn’t get disc touches: skill and lack of trust because we were female. She said, lets correct what’s in our power. Let’s correct the former.
After this, I started wondering. Would I always be a woman first? Would I be a female employee in my workplace instead of an employee? Would I be a female boss instead of a boss? Would I be a female friend before being a friend? Would I be a girl child before being a child? Because it sure as hell felt like that would be the case.
Today, I have to hide my my female body. I have to hide my breasts — dare I show too much cleavage because I don’t want to make the ‘wrong impression’. Why have we sexualised our body parts so much? So much so, that moving out without a bra in a thin completely opaque shirt can be considered ‘easy’, because it reflects ‘badly’ on one’s family? Why is my body sexualised so fucking much that I feel I am losing ownership over it? That I have to treat it and dress it the way society expects me to? That I cannot take of my shirt in public without asking for the inevitable eve-teasing? Why is the eve-teasing inevitable and why is the inevitability used to make it seem natural and acceptable?
The sexualization of my body or anybody else’s body should not be naturalised. FYI — the sexualization of breasts is cultural. the sexualisation of kissing also is cultural. We know that because there are cultures in which neither are sexual. It will do well to remember that, every time we dismiss something as natural, it has been made natural. One of my elders use to tell me, that a women’s body is “naturally more appealing and sexual than a man’s”. Bullshit. The sexualization of women is cultural. And it is a form of repression, a tool for repression (heard of The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf?).
And to all those of you who feel that this rant is privileged. I admit it, it is privileged. I am not struggling with access to education or a lack of choices when it comes to life-decisions. I am not going to be one of the many women who do not have legal or customary rights over properties. And yes, my genitals aren’t being mutilated. But that doesn’t mean that this feminism doesn’t matter. Because the threads — and you will see them if you read closely — are the same.
Stop using privilege to dismiss any feminism. Feminism can be white, it can be black and it can be brown, as it is in my case. The fact is that white feminism, black feminism, brown feminism or [insert colour here] feminism— they all have one word in common. A word that argues for equality and inclusivity and argues against the systematic oppression of half the human populace. As Meg Brennan puts it and Wendell Bernard Britt Jr. quotes in his piece:
“I think feminism is two things: 1) the moral assertion that men and women deserve equal treatment, both in law and in culture, and 2) the factual assertion that this equal treatment is not, and has never been, actualized.”
Tell me my feminism doesn’t encompass all issues and doesn’t take into account so many others, and I will readily admit it. Tell me my feminism is generalizing [like pan-african feminism that has its issues], and I will admit it. But my feminism is still feminism and my feminism is still necessary. As is yours.
Feminism is necessary because it fights for a society where humanity does trump gender. A society where we will be people first and men/women later. A society where these two binaries of male and female don’t exist and gender identities are fluid (and mind you, the fluidity is only possible if we fight for equality and fight against normative narratives around gender). A society where gender informs our perspectives but doesn’t decide our lives.
When people tell me they aren’t feminists, I wonder if they mean that they don’t stand for equality. When people are quiet after a rant or counter with a ‘but men face problems too, because of the many masculine pressures’, trust me, I get that, but I also wonder if they do not understand the degree of difference or the meaning of systematic oppression.
I am tired of hearing my female friends say “I don’t know enough about feminism to say anything about it”. I am tired of my male friends being quiet on the topic, in the fear of messing up. These reactions are harmful not neutral.
And mostly, I am tired of people dismissing my feminism as something emotional or something that lacks objectivity because I am a women, and as a women, my view on feminism is bound to affected by that. Here’s my answer: my view on feminism is informed by that. And being a women doesn’t make my view on feminism any less objective than a man’s. Because the last I checked, feminism deals with gender and everyone has a gender. No one’s view is more or less objective due to their gender.
Please note, that while all feminism is necessary, recognizing problems and privilege within the discourses is also necessary. However, dismissing feminism as a whole? Letting the problems jade your view on feminism? — all of which I see happening way too often — that’s what I am arguing against.
I am sorry that I haven’t written this better. I am sorry I have just typed and published. I am sorry I have ranted. But here’s a suggestion: take it raw. Because reading that sentence? — “Humanity trumps gender” — it made me yearn for a world where it is true. I hope it does the same for you.
If you don’t identify with feminism, understand it. If you still don’t identify, leave the semantics of it but for heaven’s sake fight. Fight for a world where humanity trumps gender. And half the fight? Its talking about it. Its speaking up. Start small but fight.
If you liked reading this, please click on the little ❤ and recommend it so other people can read it too.
