Meeting Between Merkel And Urkel Could Result In Historic Late Night Monologues
Colbert, Kimmel, Corden, and Meyers all preparing for a grueling week of comedy
Late night TV hosts are getting ready for one of the most exciting comedy events of the year — a scheduled Friday meeting between Chancellor Andrea Merkel of Germany and President Donald “Urkel” Trump of the United States.
The meeting, to be held at the White House, promises to deliver a limitless range of slapstick and lampoonable moments, from the first aggressive handshake between the German leader and the American impostor to the last errant kiss on the lips.
“I’m hoping Urkel forgets himself in the middle of dinner and reaches under the table to grab Merkel where no man has gone before,” said Jimmy Kimmel, chuckling. “She’ll throw him a look dirtier than the one she gave Bush when he moved in to knead her shoulders.”
Stephen Colbert said his writing staff was working on a skit between a frustrated Merkel and an oblivious Trump where she dresses him down for his utter lack of knowledge about NATO, the European Union, where Germany is in relation to Russia, World War I, World War II, and his mistaken belief that Japan is part of Germany. “We’re going to mine this meeting for all it’s worth,” said Colbert. “We expect to have enough comedic material to supply us with a month’s worth of monologues.”
The British late night host, James Corden, is trying to get Merkel and Trump to do one of his signature Carpool Karaoke segments. “We want to get Ms. Merkel to sing Snakehips & MO’s Don’t Leave to Mr. Trump, changing the lyrics to Please Leave,” said Mr. Corden. “And then we’ll have Mr. Trump lip-sync to Ed Sheeran’s What Do I Know? It’s going to be classic.”
Seth Meyers said they’re going to do a bit on Late Night where Trump, Merkel, and Putin are having a menage a trois. “Melania walks in and starts kissing Merkel because she’s the only one of the three the First Lady hasn’t slept with yet,” explained Meyers. “It ends with Trump and Putin having sex, too, with Vlad as pitcher and Donald as catcher. Our only concern is that it might not be funny because it’s too close to reality.”
Television industry insiders are reporting that Saturday Night Live, Conan, Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, and The Tonight Show are also staffing up with extra writers this week to fully capitalize on the anticipated, laugh-a-minute meeting between the two world leaders.
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