So you’ve bought a rhinestoned bumbag

Where to go from here

You’ve been to the Boxing Day sales. You’ve beaten your way through crowds, or worked your fingers to the bone in pursuit of the last pair of mermaid patterned tights, the espresso machine you’ll definitely wake up early enough to use and the rhinestoned bumbag you just couldn’t pass up.

It’s ok.

There’s no need to make excuses. We’ve all been where you are now — clutching a $200 sundress printed with what appear to be prawns and frantically re-checking your bank balance.

This is not about judgement — it’s about helping you through the next stage of the process. So if you’ve woken up on December 27th with a bad case of buyer’s remorse and a full set of Looney Toons novelty ties, here’s what to do:

1. Evaluate your new financial position.

Take a look at your bank account, consult your budget and work out if your boxing day splurge means you:

A) Can’t afford to eat out for a while.

B) Will have to forgo eating out and watch your grocery bill for a while.

C) May never afford to eat again. Period.

2. Consider returns options.

There usually aren’t any — sale items often waive the right to a change of mind refund, precisely because retailers know that once the 50% off fugue clears, you’re going to come to your sense and realise you do not want or need the complete Antiques Roadshow boxset. Check the refund conditions anyway, just in case.

3. Get your story straight.

When your partner finds half a tonne of mulch in the corner of your 10th floor apartment, “I was thinking of joining a community gardening program” is a much better excuse than bursting into tears and admitting you were blinded by a two-for-one deal.

4. Pay off your credit card.

Just do it. Do it now so you don’t hurt yourself anymore than you already have.

5. Preserve the evidence.

That overwhelming desire to dispose of your new buys before anyone ever finds out you actually paid real money for Hello Kitty bluetooth speakers? Ignore it. Trust me on this. Instead, put the object of your shame on display in your home. Counterintuitive, I know. Uncomfortable even. But this way, every time you pass by, it will act as a grim reminder to not do the same thing next year.

6. Embrace it.

You’re now the proud owner of lime green booty shorts. Own it. Wear them to your New Year’s party. Learn to love lime green.

Do not do the same thing next year.

ShesOnTheMoney blogs over at Mozo.com.au.