Tales from a promotional book talk
It’s never dull.
I agreed to drive two hours on a Saturday morning to talk to 17 people about my love of perennials.
True
On my way there, I drove down the wrong way on the Rt. 80 off-ramp because Google Maps told me to.
True
I continued to have faith in Google Maps and drove down a walking path in a state park.
True
I drove across preserved land in order to get off of the previously mentioned walking path and almost knocked down the sign indicating it was preserved.
True
The projector used to display my presentation was never taken out of the box and after 20 minutes of tinkering we discovered that it projected no larger than the size of an open magazine and the mean age of the audience was 83.
True
The projector idea was tossed and I sat in between all of the attendees and shared my presentation on my laptop not too unlike an oscillating fan.
True
I had to explain the concept of a blog to three different attendees but prepped ahead and gave them an age appropriate response.
True
I have the world’s cheesiest smile and should shut it down permanently.
True
I watched three different people fall asleep while I was speaking.
True
The host asked me if I had a “good sense of humor” and subsequently gave me a copy of her new book: A coloring book all about male genitalia.
True
My book is still for sale and for every sale on Amazon I make 27 cents.
True
This talk was not worth the time, effort and stress.
