The Dark Secret of Entrepreneurialism
Did you see The Lego Movie or at least hear the song Everything is Awesome? Catchy, right? When you think of people who are starting companies, you might think that’s what it must be like. Sure, it’s hard work, but when you think “entrepreneur,” you think of people working hard, whether in a hoodie or suit, getting massive checks from investors, and then going public or being bought. And it seems like everything is awesome — the CEOs always seem to be smiling, and if asked, they’ll probably even tell you everything is awesome! Heck if you’ve done any PR work, you should even know how to turn bad news like layoffs into a positive (e.g., renewed focus on core biz that benefits customers, be smarter about growth, etc.).
But the truth is that everything is not awesome. Starting a company involves a lot of stress. While that shouldn’t be surprising, the amount of stress is way beyond what I expected. Stress can be good and motivates you to perform better: see Kelly McGonigal’s excellent TED talk about embracing stress. But the levels I’ve experienced are past that, more like chronic stress. I’ve mentioned it briefly before on Hack the Entrepreneur half-jokingly, but since we recorded that podcast, my stress has done nothing but increase. The stress around starting a company can come at different times depending on your business, and for me, it’s related to fundraising. Let me tell you a bit about it and what I’ve found helps me deal with it. (For context, see this article.)
My co-founder and I are at the point where we’ve done everything we can on our own. To validate what we’re saying and get going, we need funding. We’re trying to find family offices/high-net worth individuals interested in film. Film’s the only industry considered recession-proof, and its returns are similar to many hedge funds. Plus there are various tax incentives related to production.
You would think with all this, it’d be relatively easy to find interested parties — and we do. But despite nothing but positive feedback, we haven’t succeeded in finding a lead investor. This gets stressful for three reasons. The first is you never know what each day might bring and a tiny thing can cause drastic mood swings. Second, we feel like we’ve done everything we can/are trying our hardest but having a person say “yes” and being able to move to the next level is out of our direct control. Last, because we have done our best/invested a lot of personal energy/time/money into this, not finding a lead investor makes us feel like failures, which is demoralizing. As more time passes, the stress escalates.
What does that stress feel like? For me, it started as a periodic tension in my jaw. I don’t clench it or grind my teeth, but I’d feel this ache on both sides (no, I don’t need a root canal). It’s also often there as sort of a low-level headache/tension in my head. Other times, you’ll be doing something random, and this odd, sick feeling can just come over your whole body. It’s not fun.
But the craziest thing through all of this is that you can’t show the stress, even though part of a stress response is an oxytocin release, motivating you to share how you feel. Entrepreneurs need to always be calm, excited, and outgoing because you never know when you’ll sit next to someone who becomes your lead investor. To be fair, the excited part is easy because when we talk about what we’re doing, we do get excited. But needing to appear calm means you have to own and control stress.
While different people have different approaches, I’ve found some healthy ways to own and manage my stress. The first is high-intensity activities that have you so focused, you can’t think of anything but what you’re doing. I’ve found that crazy workouts like the P90X and Insanity series fit the bill — it’s nice to just have someone telling you what to do for 30–90 minutes, and you’re a pile of sweaty mush when done/feel relaxed for a while. Skiing, kiteboarding, and other sports that require focus also work nicely. Yoga comes a close second, as I’m thinking about my body position and breathing, but my mind does wander during some poses. I’ve never been into meditation, and I don’t think I could clear my mind enough to meditate right now ☺
Complementing exercise, I find food makes a difference. If my meal is a protein bar, I’m not excited about it. But if it’s a flavorful dish like this chicken tagine recipe, it acts like comfort food. Comfort food doesn’t have to be unhealthy and make you lethargic. I try to avoid heavy meals, as I find it makes me feel blah, which adds to my stress. Dark chocolate (just a couple squares after a meal, which is less than 1 serving) is also good for your soul. What’s even better is if I can share a good meal with a friend, and focus on their world and their ups/downs. Believe it or not, helping others helps reduce your own stress level.
Movies, great TV, and just good stories also help. A great story will transport you somewhere else, providing a brief escape. Thank goodness the new season of House of Cards starts shortly! Having your own creative outlet can help too, as long as it’s something that keeps you focused. I’m a photographer, and I’ve found that when I’m out actively shooting, I feel better and get energized over my subject. But when I’m waiting for a shot, my mind drifts back to fundraising.
The one thing that all of these activities have in common is that they take time, and as much as I’d like to say I’m spending every waking second focusing on Visioneer, I spend a good bit of time engaged in these stress-reducing activities to help me stay sane: I think it’s important. Studies also show that taking a break can lead to better solutions, as our brains will keep thinking in the background.
But really, the thing that helps the most is to deal with the underlying cause. When I find leads, and especially when they ask to see our business plan/financials/investor FAQ, my stress level drops. And when we do get funded, while I’m sure something else will cause me to stress out, my stress level will “reset,” giving my brain a much needed break!
I’d love to hear if you have any tips about how you embrace your stress! And if you know anyone interested in investing in film, you’d be doing my brain and body a huge favor if you pinged me!
