End Of The Line

One Door Closes, another Door Closes

Mike Palmer
By No Means Perfect
3 min readJul 12, 2018

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  • “One door closes, and another door opens”
  • “When God closes a door he opens a window”

These modern urban nuggets of wisdom are familiar to us all.

Here’s another one:

One door closes, another door closes, and now you’re boxed in!

We feel this way sometimes. Life can seem like one door closes, God opens a window, He jumps out, and we’re stuck. Not to make light of anyone’s faith, but life can feel this way. No matter your spiritual/religions beliefs, we can feel trapped, alone, or out of options.

When doors close we are not necessarily boxed in. We might feel trapped, but if we step back and look objectively we have options.

But these options might not be what we’re used to. Options don’t always come in the form of external circumstances. Many times our greatest opportunities & successes are found internally rather than externally.

So you feel trapped, what to do?

Feeling limited by other people and circumstances provides a great chance to recenter yourself, review some Stoic principles, and let the Stoic in you come to life.

Ignore Stupid People

I’ve written about this previously, but we have to remind ourselves to ignore these type of people. We may have to deal with stupid people in our everyday lives, but we don’t have to take their words and opinions to heart. Many times these type of people can be very loud voices in our lives…but their words are of no consequence. Deal with their messes, work thru the challenges they bring, but ignore their words and assessments of you. Remember they’re stupid! Lean into your real friends and community and develop a synergy with those people. In the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey says synergy (properly understood) is the highest activity in all of life. So, synergize with the right people and ignore the stupid ones. After all, our struggles provide a bridge to helping others.

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Remember your power

Remember: facts don’t matter, only your perception of the facts matters — and you’re in total control of that. What will you choose to focus on? Will you guard your attention, thoughts, reactions, and conversations? Don’t relinquish your power of perception. I’m not talking about being “fake-happy”, this is a calling to accept the current situation and thrive in spite of it. That’s what Stoicism is all about — not being captive to the external world. The present obstacle you face offers a chance to grow and improve — let this be your perspective. Control what you can and do your best with the rest.

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Cultivate Gratitude

If whatever you’re facing is significant, then it’s probably sucking the life from you. Beating you down…Demoralizing you. But what can you be grateful for today? Start with the simple things — basic necessities of life…then think of your friends & family, your job. In the comfort of Western society, gratitude alludes us. We have a hard time cultivating thankfulness because we’re overwhelmed with excess. Overindulgence is now the norm. There are people in the world experiencing great injustices at the hands of tyrants…poor people being exploited and oppressed…political unrest and violence. We have a lot of areas for which to be grateful. Don’t take gratefulness for granted.

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Life is about persevering through struggle…not about getting your way. Life is easy when things go well, but our struggles define us. True success requires the strength to fight. We all want the victory without the battle. But true success is defined by the BS you’re willing to fight through.

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