The Name for Each Age

A Lesson in Korean Culture and Confucianism

This column was originally published on October 24, 2010 in the now inactive online journal,Sundayed.

I arrived in New York City for the speaking engagement at the New York County Lawyers Association at midday. Rather than sitting in my hotel room - my speech was already memorized - I went for a manicure and pedicure at a midtown salon. The nail technician was a Korean woman in her mid 50’s or so. I typically don’t talk much under those circumstances. Soap bubbles, lotion and someone else’s soft warm hands help me relax, meditate on life and catch a breath.

But New Yorkers are curious about visitors. She asked me where I was from, why I was in New York. Since I was dressed casually I think she was surprised to hear I was in town to give a speech to a group of attorneys about the Lehman Brothers failure. That prompted the typical questions about marital status, kids, and job. My story is not a short one, and so we ended up deep in conversation.

Her story was long, too. She arrived in New York from Korea more than twenty years ago but her English was still heavily accented. We talked about our lives. I told her I had been married a while then divorced at 35. She was still married and her children were now in their twenties.

She told me that Koreans have a word and symbol for all of the decades of life. The word and the accompanying symbol are supposed to embody the spirit for that point in life. The message is both practical and philosophical. We agreed that 40 is a pivotal age for a woman, whether you are married and a mother or neither, as I am. When she meditated on the special word for age 40, she had come to a new acceptance of everything that had happened to her before and since.

I was surprised that I had never heard anything about the “Name for Each Age”. One of my oldest and dearest friends is originally from South Korea and I have recently become acquainted with an American who has lived in South Korea for more than twenty years. Granted, they are men and typical men don’t often talk of such things. But most men I spend time with are thoughtful and contemplative. I’m also an attentive listener to stories about different cultures.

It took quite a bit of digging by my friend in Korea, Bob, to unearth the details behind what this woman had told me. Bob is a former Big 4 consulting firm partner, an American living in Korea, teaching at a university. He recently renounced his U.S. citizenship to become a Korean citizen. The nail technician had written out the English phonetic representation of the Korean characters associated with some of the ages we had discussed. She scribbled the characters on a card for Dermalogica skin care products. I took a photo of the flyer full of characters and sent it to Bob via email.

The history of “The Name for Each Age” is ancient. It comes probably from the period of Korean history known as the Three Nations era around 300 AD, perhaps before. It was during this period that Confucianism and other artifacts of Chinese culture became welcome (as well as political and military alliances). As such, the Names and their definitions originate from the Chinese language of that period.

Many Koreans know the names but few, Bob discovered, actually know the original meanings. This led him to the elders in his neighborhood who have had training in both Chinese characters and Confucianism. Bob told me that they had a hard time translating the characters into modern Korean since they had difficulty imagining the modern day Korean words represented by the Chinese.

Keep in mind that in the period this originated few people lived beyond age 35 or 40.

AGE NAME 한글 MEANING

15 Ge Hak 지학 Age where one recognizes the value of education

20 Yak Kwan 약 관 Age when a boy becomes a man (Sorry. No equivalent for women)

30 I Lib 이 립 Age to begin your life’s planning

40 Pul Hok 불혹 Age when you have enough experience not to be fooled by others

50 Ji Yung 지영 Age when you begin to understand the Gods’ thinking (Note: Not religious Gods but forces of nature.)

60 I Soon 이 순 Age where you have the experience to take in the thoughts of others and determine the best and worst

61 Hwan Gap 환 갑 Notable age as you have now lived through one full cycle of the 12 annual symbols (i.e. Year of the Dragon )

70 Ko He 고희 Age where you are filled with happiness (Because you are not dead, I guess.)

80 San Su 신수 Meaning for this age and age 90 and 100 is as a title only to signify you have reached this age.

90 Chol Su 졸수 See 80.

100 Sang Su 상 수 See 80, and with additional meaning of exceptionally long life.