Stop Body Shaming But Don’t Accept Your Body Either
This is a bit of a rant but before I go off, I have a preface:
- I used to be skinny and now i’m not. I’ve seen both sides.\
- Skip to The Rant if you don’t care about my person story
- I wrote this at work and quickly so know that there are many spelling errors
This is a picture of what I looked like four years ago. I was skinny. At the time, I never thought I was skinny but college hit and I can confirm, four years ago, I was skinny. As I have seen myself gain subtle weight in the last four years, there has been a movement of body shaming/accepting you for who you are and all that jazz. I have a problem with both of these things.
- Body shaming makes you a bully
- Accepting your body makes you a quitter. It means you aren’t working to improve yourself and grow as a person.
I am good at a lot of things. I won’t be humble about it. I have acquired lots of skills in the past 8 years. I learned guitar and become quite good at it. I learned videography. I started a startup that got past the ideation phase. I got positions that I never could have dreamed of getting. Hell, I was media/marketing director of the ASU Undie Run. That’s lucky. If you are reading this, you have seen all these things plastered all over my newsfeed and you probably see the best of me.
That’s what social media is for. We don’t post our struggles. We don’t post our worsts. We post our bests and we see others at their best. Its a pretty screwed up machine that isn’t changing anytime soon. Well, as I have been posting about these great things for the past 8 years, I have been experiencing the biggest struggle I have dealt with in my life. It is even worse than Kleine-Levin Syndrome. It’s worse because I beat KLS. I haven’t beat this. This struggle has been maintaining a healthy lifestyle/healthy weight.
Starting in Sophomore year, college got the best of me and I started developing some horrible habits of eating. I saw my weight slowly creep up and I wasn’t really doing anything about it. Sure, I was playing ultimate twice a week but that’s not enough. Health needs to be intentional. It’s not a bi-product of playing a sport, living in a healthy city, or having healthy roommates. It needs to be intentional.
My problem is the intentionality. I can be intentional for two weeks but can’t for two months. I play ultimate and say “this is going to be great for my health. I can eat whatever now.” I move to Boulder and say “this is going to be amazing for my health. I am surrounded by all these healthy people which is going to make me healthy too!”.
No. Just no. That’s not how it works. Its supposed to be a struggle. It’s supposed to be hard. It’s supposed to take years. But I will never accept my body for what it is. Sure, I may have fast food in the future but I will never feel okay about it. The day that you accept your body for how it is and what it looks like is the day you fail. You are a project and the turn-in pile is inside of your coffin. You have a whole lifetime to improve yourself..or to try to. This is where I have a problem with body shaming/body accepting.
If you body shame, fuck you.
Everyone has a journey and everyone has a struggle. Is that girl really skinny and attractive and you’re jealous? You didn’t see the 15 years of blood, sweat, and tears she poured into that body. You didn’t see her at 250. She earned it.
Is that fat guy really a waste of space and you just want to pick on him? Little did you know, he is actually 150 down from 450 pounds but is very fragile at the same time. Losing weight is hard and any words of discouragement could cause someone to spiral out of control.
With that said, never accept yourself for who you are.
Don’t accept your current level of intelligence.
Don’t accept your current job
Don’t accept your current position in life
Don’t accept your body
Why not? We are human. We are made to progress and grow. When you accept, you stop growing. You stop progressing. You stagnate. This doesn’t mean you can’t struggle as you grow because every struggle you face helps you grow. I struggle. I weight a similar weight as a year ago but if I tracked it, you will see fluctuations of up to 30 pounds. That shows struggle. I try. I try hard. Then I don’t. I wonder why I don’t. Then I try.
I go through this because I don’t accept my body for how it is. Are you fat? Skinny? Dad-bod? Wherever you are, keep moving forward. Don’t do it for the looks, the girl, or the social status. Do it because you aren’t a quitter. Lose the weight because we were born to struggle and grow and fail. but please don’t accept yourself for who you are. Don’t stagnate.