The Quest for Happiness And Fulfillment
The road is winding but uniquely rewarding
It’s simple; If you’re happy, you’ll feel fulfilled. And no matter what your definition of true happiness is, living a happy and fulfilled life is within your reach.
The question is, how do we break free from the ups and downs of happiness and negativity? Because the truth is, a little negativity can hold us back for days, and might even make some people lose direction toward achieving their goal. So how do we get out of the negativity loop?
Good question, right? And the answer might surprise you.
The reason why we’re not happy sometimes is not that anything is wrong with us. It’s because we have attached happiness to certain things and the moment those things are absent, life stops making sense. We stop feeling fulfilled and even lose the energy to keep going.
For some people, it’s not getting the morning coffee before they get to work, for others, it’s not meeting reaching the target they have set for themselves. Most people even quickly become unhappy when they can’t satisfy their emotional needs.
You see, we have become so attached to things that many people are more unhappy in the world today than ever, and as a result of that, many people are unfulfilled.
Solution? Be willing to declutter your mind and look at happiness from another perspective.
Declutter simply means to let go of those things that you’re so scared of losing. To remove unnecessary things that won’t add long-time value to your life. Once you’re able to do that, you give yourself an edge to look at happiness from another perspective.
One of my favorite sayings is “those who dare to let go and make positive changes despite fear are the ones that win and get the most out of life.”
Let’s take a look at how you can cultivate more happiness and fulfillment in your life, shall we?
Attaining Happiness Must Never Go Against Your Core Values
What I mean by this is that the way you make yourself happy must never go against your morals and way of living.
Think for a moment about a guy who thinks he will be happy if he bought the latest iPhone 11, the problem? He didn’t have the money to purchase the phone, So he decides to steal or manipulate others into getting it for him.
Sure, he might end up buying the phone, but soon enough, the guilt of wasting money, or the damage he has done to others will come back and bite him. He’ll feel depressed, and he might even feel like a fraud.
The short story above illustrates what can happen to you if you violate your core values to attain happiness.
The way you attain happiness must never go against your core values.
Who are you?
What do you live for?
What are your standards?
You must check to make sure you’re not going against your core values when you’re trying to do something that makes you happy.
A better version of the story could be: The guy brainstorming on how he can bring in enough money to by the iPhone, he might ask himself, what service could I provide to others to earn the money I want in return? Who can I reach out to for help? And so much more.
Be patient, and be willing to wait if you have to, you want to be real to yourself as much as possible, even if it means you become unreal to others. Remember, no one knows you like you do.
If you try to find happiness through actions that clash with your core values, you won’t be happy and fulfilled — you’ll suffer instead.
“There are some values that you should never compromise on to stay true to yourself; you should be brave to stand up for what you truly believe in even if you stand alone.” — Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
Don’t Cling to Unpleasant Thoughts And Memories
The very thought of unpleasant things, hurtful memories, and regrets can hold us back and make us unhappy throughout life.
Thoughts are energy. What you think about will determine the kind of energy you’ll have to navigate.
Sometimes we become unhappy because we can’t have what we want right now, or the thought that others are doing better than we are, or the very feelings of regrets we get from something we don’t have control over.
What are you focusing on? Where are you drawing your energy from? It would help if you learned how to stop focusing on every other thing that weighs you down and starts focusing on the things that can uplift you.
Let your mistakes serve as a lesson, be willing to go through it, don’t miss any opportunities, then focus on how you can make your life better, and grow stronger.
“When you cling to something from the past, your hands cannot be open to receive the gifts of the future.” — Kate McGahan
Don’t Rely on Others to Make You Happy
Relying on others does not always mean you’re expecting material things from them; it could also mean defining your own life by their point of view. The thought of not conforming to what others expect from you can damage your self worth and makes you unhappy
By this, I don’t mean you shouldn’t learn or pay attention to positive advice from others; what I mean is you don’t abdicate the driver seat of your life to anyone.
Making a decision and taking action must come from you first.
That’s why I recommend you write out what your core values are and let them be the guide by which all your decision and actions are made.
“Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind than on outward circumstances.” — Benjamin Franklin
What Motivates You?
This is a big one, and it means you have to let the reward of the goals drive you often than the pain point.
What drives you? What reward are you seeking from what you’re doing right now? Where do you see yourself ten years from now?
In days when we are unhappy, when we’ve lost the momentum to keep going: focusing on the reward could help us reignite our hope and keep the fire burning.
Be willing to push through the hard times. Not because of the short-term pain, but the longterm reward.
The fact is, you’re going to run into challenges from time to time, so what? Every successful person you see today has experienced the same problems. You must be willing to go through it and keep yourself motivated no matter what.
“Find what makes you happy and go for it with all your heart. It will be hard, but I promise it will be worth it.” — Charlotte Eriksson
Never Give Up
On the days when there’s no happiness, switch your focus to longterm goals and the legacy you want to create. That should lift your spirits again. If not? It might be that you’re craving material things and status. Reflect, adjust your focus, and you will find your spark again.
