A PERVERSE SECRET TO SUCCESS / SATISFACTION
“True intelligence is the ability to hold two competing ideas in your mind at the same time.” — George Bernard Shaw
I hold the below two opposing views as fundamentally true:
· In the game: all outcomes are due to you
· Outside the game (when contemplating life): fortune, good or bad, may be as much a factor of luck as anything else
I was raised to believe:
“If you can see it, and feel it, you can make it happen!”
— Mum“If you think you can do it; you’re right!
If you think you can’t; you’re right again.”
— Dad
I preferred Mum’s overtly positive spin. She is very careful with her use of language, because she considers it the path to the subconscious. Focus on the positive.
I think it helped me immeasurably when ‘in the game’, whether that was sport or business. I believed everything was in my control. I never looked for excuses. If I came across a barrier, I would redouble my efforts and work out how to influence the outcomes through my actions.
This was a belief that helped me to grow businesses in a competitive environment.
In saying that, however, life has also taught me that luck has a role to play and you can never be certain how much of your own successes or failures, or those of others, is due to luck.
Certainly, I worked hard, but there are others who have also worked hard, but have not been successful.
Certainly, I am reasonably smart, but there are many smarter people who have not been as successful.
What I have learned is that you should hold two opposing concepts as true:
1. When in the game (whether it be work, sport or anything else) consider every outcome controllable. Apply yourself fully and believe from the bottom to the top of your soul that you can make what you want to happen, happen.
2. When out of the game (when contemplating life and who you are) be grateful for success and philosophical about any lack of success. Chin-up and carry-on.
Often in life, the forces of the world are far greater than the ability of a person to shape them.
To believe all of life is due to your efforts invites hubris, and as the saying goes: hubris comes before the fall. Like a Greek Tragedy, so many successful people are running along well, only to then pull out their short sword and fall on it. That short sword is often an overblown belief in themselves.
I know this from experience.
Equally important, is when things have not gone well, don’t imagine it was all you. Learn what lessons you can from your failures, but also know it could well have been due to anything, from a sprinkle to a s**t storm of bad luck.
Dust yourself off and get back in the game. And when you’re in the game again, remember: consider every outcome controllable.
A deep understanding and belief in the two concepts will help you in your dealings with others:
· You can’t know how much of your own life has been due to luck, and
· You can’t know how much of somebody else’s life is due to luck.
When somebody has not been successful, you will have more empathy, “There but for the grace of God go I”.
When somebody has been successful, you won’t have an unrealistic adoration of them. They are a person like you, no more and no less.
Luck and skill/effort are two sides of the same coin. Both are useful in different circumstances. Don’t get caught up with one or the other. Life is complex, be conscious of the role they both play.
I could write a book about my life and attribute the major outcomes to a series of fortunate events.
I could also write a book of my life and attribute most of the major outcomes to my hard work and personal skills.
Both would be credible; even to me. Which is more correct?
I hear you say, “the harder I work the luckier I am.”
This is self-evidently true. A passionate drive to do well is far more likely to be rewarded than a lazy approach. This I believe. However, it is also true that people can just be lucky.
Which rule is more important? Neither! People try to simplify life, but it’s inherently complex. Two competing ideas is not too much to hold in your mind.
