By Jennifer Magee
Relationships. Communication. Turning Points. Simplicity. These were all the topics Jay Frankel addressed as he sat down with our Group Leaders today during their orientation.
Jay Frankel is the founder of the company True to Life, which helps camps and their counselors throughout North America increase their leadership ability, job performance and social connections. After spending the morning observing and being engaged by Frankel’s session, I was lucky enough to walk through camp with him and discuss his motivations, beliefs and hopes for the new staff that are about to arrive at IHC.
Having gone to camp himself, Frankel believes that freedom and reinvention of camp “allows you to find so many different sides of yourself” whether you’re a camper or a counselor. The simplest moments of living away from your parents and being surrounded by campers and counselors makes “you grow so much”.
His love for camp and his ability to engage an audience, with his guidance in incorporating key interpersonal skills, is the reason IHC have invited him back for the last 18 years. He says himself that he is very “honored” that year after year IHC rely on his excellence during orientation, however IHC also holds a “special place” in his heart. In regards to the Directors, Lauren and Joel Rutkowski, Frankel is in awe of the work they have done and how they have “put their imprint on how their generation views what camp should be and the importance of female empowerment. There’s just so much wonderful intention” at IHC.
Frankel connects with our staff on a personal level in his discussions. He allows and encourages our staff to express their gifts, and their fears relating to the challenges they might face throughout the summer, whether that be engaging and leading their staff to connecting and bonding with our campers.
While addressing a group of people in their early twenties, he makes them aware of the journey that they will go through throughout the camp season. Creating realistic situations that may take people out of our their comfort zones, in a “lecture” environment, sets them up for both positive and negative real life camp moments. Posing a simple scenario, and looking for a response makes people think, over think, or simply freeze. But it is in these moments that Frankel encourages and responds with “it’s okay to have a problem”.
Simplicity is the key to communication. Basic leading questions. Getting to the root of the issue. Don’t jump to conclusions. Don’t be cliche. Don’t be profound. Just be present.
“You don’t always have to have an answer, which I feel like as a girl, if we go to each other with problems you feel like you have to have an answer to that problem, but the realization is you don’t. You can just sit and listen and you don’t have to come up with a brilliant answer, it can be something straightforward. That’s the best thing I learned this morning”- Abbie, 24
The simplicity of Frankel’s message makes our staff think. Our Group Leaders become our connection to other staff and directly to the campers. It is not only about leading our campers safely to an activity but also navigating “not just the kids, which is a no brainer, but the staff” on a journey too. He wants to prove to our Group Leaders that “they are more than capable to navigate that journey for their staff with some honesty, some good communication and some really good empathy and awareness.”
Finishing off our walk I asked Jay Frankel, if he was to give one piece of advice to the 2018 staff of IHC what would it be? And he left me on this note:
“I would love them to remember that behaviors that people demonstrate, whether it’s kids or adults, there is usually a story behind that. QTIP: Quit taking it personally. Stop making everything about you and really take a moment to understand where their behavior is coming from, why they are acting the way they’re acting. And if you do that, then you can help people really find their way so beautifully at camp, and I think too often we see folks making everything about themselves. I would love it if they could make it about someone else.”
