Are You a Disappearing Woman?
The disappearing woman does not believe that she is lovable.
He talked to me but did not see me.
He made love to me, but my pleasure was unimportant to him.
He enjoyed my company, but I was not his partner.
I was invisible in that relationship for 12 out of 14 years. Going through the motions of trying to be seen by someone who was blind to my presence. I played the role of being who he needed me to be. So that he could be who he thought he was.
The relationship was good until I wasn’t. The more I grew into myself, the more he resented me. Loving words turned to barbed wire, cutting into the flesh of my psyche.
By the time I woke up, I had already disappeared.
Are you a “disappearing woman?”
Beverly Engle coined disappearing Woman Syndrome (D.W.S.) in her book Loving Him without Losing You.
Ever heard of it?
A disappearing woman is a woman who has lost herself in her relationship, family, work, or pity. She struggles with self-expression because she is afraid of pushing her partner away. And is often irritated or angry because she stuffs down her truth.
