Build the Network You Need to Achieve Your Professional Aspirations
The people you surround yourself with can greatly affect your career trajectory. Individuals we regularly interact with can influence our decisions, perspectives, and even our happiness. The people in your network can energize or deplete you. Inspire or discourage you. Support or undermine you. With this in mind, you should be selective and intentional about the people with whom you spend your valuable time.
I’m a huge believer in certain people entering our lives at certain moments for certain reasons. Even seemingly random people I’ve crossed paths with have had an enormous impact on the professional choices I made. In fact, all my career pivots were set into motion from a conversation I had with an individual that tipped my perspectives in a different direction. Therefore, proactively taking the initiative to shape your network is a good investment of time.
Historical Connections Are Critical
As someone now in my mid-40s, the nature of my professional connections and personal relationships has radically evolved. These days, primarily due to my own time constraints as a working parent, I tend to be more selective about the people I spend my time with, both personally and professionally. As a result, my network of close professional colleagues and personal friends seems to have gotten smaller, not larger, over time, although higher quality.
Family and friends can play a unique role in your professional confidence. My mother, who has sacrificed so much to help me thrive, continues to be a source of unwavering encouragement. Loyal friends (chosen family) who entered my life decades ago consistently inspire me with their kindness, character, and ability to keep me grounded in what truly matters.
Consider which personal connections of yours align with your values. Which individuals help remind you of what’s most important? Prioritize these relationships to help you avoid distraction and focus on what truly matters to you in your career and life.
Surround Yourself With The “Right” Individuals
I’ll admit I’ve had my fair share of self-doubts and intensive self-critique throughout my career. I constantly re-evaluate whether I’m on the right path, whether I can approach things differently, or whether I’m doing everything I can to provide value to my clients.
I’ve found it useful to clearly define what I want my personal and professional circles to look like. These criteria vary from individual to individual, but these days, I tend to gravitate toward individuals with supportive attitudes, thoughtful input, and healthy perspectives. However, I try not to be too quicky to judge. I’ve often been surprised at who ends up being someone I want to connect with again.
Deciding what you want your professional community to look like is a critical part of supporting your career ambitions. As you think about the professional you want to be, what types of people do you want to spend more of your time with? Who makes you feel more confident about where you’re headed? Proactively connect with these individuals, one at a time.
Set Community Standards For Your Life
We hear about community standards for online groups, companies, and even countries. When was the last time you considered the community standards for your own professional network?
Set standards for the community of people you choose to have around you. Alongside selectively prioritizing people in your life, equally important is steering clear of people who consistently disempower, disrespect, or discredit you. You should also be wary of people who have preconceived notions of how your career should be because they may dissuade you from exploring other paths that could be better for your life.
Be intentional about the individuals you allow into your life and whose opinions you’ll allow to affect your self-perception, aspirations, and even your sense of self-worth. For example, I aim to avoid individuals who are disrespectful, negative, or overly judgmental. I avoid those who consistently misinterpret my actions, posture to prove themselves, or undermine my efforts. Fortunately, these people are few and far between.
Whenever possible, move away from people who don’t adhere to your own community standards. This difficult step is necessary to create more space for those who do belong. Has someone in your network been bringing you down instead of lifting you up? Is there someone who feels more like an enemy than an ally? While it may not be easy, you owe it to yourself to distance yourself if that individual brings more negativity rather than positivity into your life.
Diversity Is Still Useful
We’ve all received criticism, and I’m certainly no stranger to it. I’ve had plenty of people in my career question my choices, my ambitions, or whether my priorities are in the right place. I’ll admit, I sometimes allow those comments to affect me more than they should. I think most of us would agree being around like-minded individuals is way easier than being around a bunch of people who disagree with you.
I’m not suggesting you surround yourself only with those who agree with you or people who are exactly like you. Some of my most significant personal growth has come from interactions with those who challenged me to approach things differently. Diversity within your professional network is incredibly valuable.
However, I still recommend ensuring you spend ample time with people doing things you want to do, living a life you admire, and behaving in ways you hope to emulate. Doing this allows you to have the emotional reserve to not only tolerate but perhaps embrace and learn from people you find more challenging.
Fill Your Network With Intention
Too often, I, like many people I know, get sucked into just staying afloat with day-to-day tasks. If you’re like me, you may focus more on sustaining rather than abstaining. Or maintaining your existing connections rather than pausing to reassess whether those people still belong.
But periodically stopping to reassess and think critically about who should and should not fill your inner circle is critical. So take the time to regularly assess whether the relationships you have in your life are supporting your professional growth.
While you may not be able to choose your manager, direct report, or colleagues, you can make an effort to build a community of people outside of your workplace who truly uplift and inspire you. One that aligns with your values and aspirations. If you take the time to thoughtfully and intentionally shape your network, your future self will thank you for the additional support, motivation, and inspiration it provides over the years.
Originally published at https://www.forbes.com.
