Quit job: Start Writing.

A sabbatical without the security.

Maybe I just always thought of myself as an ideas man. That was the problem. I always had a new idea for a restaurant, or a summer camp or a film script. But it was the idea for a television show that started it all…

I was living in Beaufort, South Carolina, teaching and coaching at a wonderful small school, Beaufort Academy. I enjoyed my job as well as the unique experience of being a young Brit living in a small Southern historic waterfront town. Part of the reason I had moved there was to write. I imagined evenings sipping Bourbon on a deck with the palm trees blowing in the sub-tropical winds. (It wasn’t far from the truth, but substitute Bourbon for beer - I tended to throw up if I drank anything stronger.) I was playing lots of tennis, drinking a lot and enjoying my job. However, I was not getting a lot of writing done.

After a longish term break-up I realised that after nearly three years, it was time for me to move on. Beaufort was an incredible experience where I made life-long friends. I was welcomed into a small community with such love and generosity that I will forever be in its debt. However, being single and thirty in Beaufort was not part of my plan, nor should it be anybody’s. Especially when I was starting to make some headway with an idea for a TV show; I wanted to take the plunge and focus on writing.

Moving back home to London after a prolonged time abroad is a challenging thing. I have to admit that I almost stayed somewhere I no longer wanted to live, purely because I had a nice car and an apartment. Independence is a tough thing to give up. I could not stomach the idea of moving back in with my parents, lovely as they are. There is, I found, a sense of failure linked with the idea of moving home. I was scared. Which is silly, really. It took an hour long phone call to a friend’s therapist in New York to finally make me see sense with one simple question, ‘What if going home didn’t mean failing?’ Why hadn’t I thought of it that way? Maybe it wasn’t failing to go home to your family and childhood friends. As a dear friend said, ‘Tom, you are moving back to London. It’s not like you are from Coventry.” (I would like to apologize to anyone from Coventry. I went there on a Year 9 R.E trip and had a great time!).

I moved home to London, sad to leave my job as Director of Conduct at a prestigious and historic school, but happy to follow my passion to write. I was doing what all the YouTube motivational videos and motivational speakers tell you to do… living my dream. And you know what? It’s been totally worth it. I have not regretted a thing. However…

There have been downs

Here are just few.

1. On my first weekend back in London three girls, on separate occasions, walked away from a conversation with me when I told them I was an unemployed writer. This was disheartening mainly because they happened to be among the first people I told I was, well, sorry, a… writer. God, that was hard to do. I mean, am I? No one told me to do this. I have to convince myself everyday that I am not like someone on the X-Factor who thinks they can sing. Apparently - and this is almost a word for word what one of their friends told me - I should have talked about property and job security. Dating has changed.
2. Not having a job, well, a paying one. When going from a decent salary to zero, it’s hard to adjust your lifestyle without alienating your friends. Drinks, meals, going out, who knew London was so expensive? It is, really, really, bloody expensive. There are only so many meals of beans on toast a person can stomach. So, learning to budget and allowing yourself a treat every now and again is a must. If I could give up alcohol and meat, it would be a lot easier.
3. Cover teaching. Going from a Director (essentially a Deputy Head) to someone who students are predisposed not to respect was a tough blow to the self-esteem. Especially as my expectations of students had not changed. Being an effective teacher without the rapport with students was a challenge.
4. The never-ending feeling that no-one asked you to do this. No Robin Williams like professor took me aside and said ‘Tom, my boy, you’ve the making of a fine writer.’ I was having dinner with some friends and a close friend made a comment about me being ‘a great teacher.’ There was no hiding the fact that what he really meant was that I was wasting my time and should get a decent job/career like everyone else at the table and put to bed my silly notion that I could be different. Sometimes the subtle digs cut the deepest.
5. When you go out with friends, invariably as someone doing something different the conversation can focus on you a bit more than usual. This can make you feel awkward as you don’t want any special treatment or to be in anyway different that anyone else at the table. You begin to feel uncomfortable that others may resent the undeserved spotlight on you and end up mumbling something before asking any question to anyone else at the table that you can think of to attract attention away from yourself.
6. There are black days where you can’t get out of bed. Where you don’t talk to a soul and you can’t write a word. You spend most of the day trying to come up with a plan to not sit alone drinking in your apartment. You think that everyone in the world is having a productive and efficient day and you are the only person in the world doing nothing, and it’s all your fault. This isn’t the case. Honestly, being in an office or place of work does not mean someone is being productive.
7. In my old job, I got lots of feedback. Whether it was a pat on the back, a mention in a staff meeting, or even someone telling me how I could do something better. With writing, there is none of that. You hear nothing for eight weeks then get, mostly a generic e-mail saying ‘Thanks, but no thanks.’ You have to get used to not only spending most days alone, but also getting little to no positive feedback in terms of your work.

The Good News

1. I have been overwhelmed with love and support. Anytime a friend tells me that they respect what I am doing, it is the most uplifting feeling. There are so many people who say ‘I wish I could do that.’ The truth is they can. I am proof of that. It’s not self-satisfaction that you are doing something that others would like to do. Rather a sense of accomplishment that you jumped off the cliff while others stood and rocked back and forth trying to build up the momentum. Perhaps it is a little of both, but I think it comes from a good place where you have a sense of lightness when you are on your way to do something you love.
2. New connections with old friends. Since doing this, I have reconnected with lots of friends, who are either writers or write in their spare time or simply want to write. Sharing work with them and reading their work has been a great experience and a joyful one. Having the privilege of being one of the first people to read someone else’s work is a great thrill. Also receiving feedback (even if a little biased, or at least gentle) does have value and even if all it does is make you want to make it better for that person, it was worth it.
3. I wake up nearly everyday with a sense of purpose and freedom. I definitely feel like the Master of my fate and the Captain of my soul. Certainly bloodied but definitely unbowed.
4. Once you find a routine and stick to it, you can actually be productive. I go to the British Library, Monday to Friday. I feel like I am commuting to work with everyone else but I have a nicer destination, or so I like to think. I don’t have a word limit or a time limit. I get there and try and stay as long as I can. One of the things I realised is you have to be nice to yourself. All that matters is that you are producing work, and showing up.
5. Flexibility: As a teacher, or with any job, there were numerous things I didn’t/couldn’t do. Go out to events during the week. Go away during school term. Now I can go to almost anything I want, within reason. Writing seminar in Bulgaria? Why not? Four days at a farm in Wales? Sure. As long as you are still getting the work done you now have a sense of total freedom as writing really can be done anywhere.

Conclusion — For now.

I know this isn’t for everyone. If I get to the end of my year and I have made no headway with getting an agent or publishing any of my work, then I will probably return to teaching, and write whenever I can in my spare time; many famous writers have done the same. I may take a part-time job and continue writing, because, as we all know, it won’t necessarily happen within a certain time limit. However, I will always know that I gave myself a shot to build up some steam and I truly believe that you don’t regret what you do, only what you do not.

Work Produced.

Sentence- Sentence is a comedy television show. Focussing on Simon Shaw, a struggling writer who is given six months by his parents to get published or be financially cut off. Simon, having never had a job, decided his only choice is to be sent to a minimum-security prison. There, he can have three meals a day, some light exercise and plenty of free time to write his breakthrough novel. However, upon embarking on his journey, Simon finds it’s hard to get arrested when you’re White, middle class, have no criminal record, and are not prepared to do anything ‘really bad’.(In no way is this autobiographical, no way, at all!)

Tracks in the Smoke— (Novel) The Hard Way is a London-based detective novel featuring Nick Dante. After spending eight years in military intelligence, Dante is back in London scraping a living as a Private Investigator. When an album by teen-pop mega star Maya Prada is leaked, Dante is hired to try and prove the company under suspicion are innocent. Dante, hard-drinking and aspiring curmudgeon wades through murky London both for answers and a quiet spot to finish his pint undisturbed. You can purchase ‘Tracks in the Smoke’ in either Kindle or paperback format here

Signal Problems — (Short Story) Reluctantly on his way to an online date, a young man sparks up a conversation with an attractive young lady. As the tube rumbles onwards their conversation takes the evening to a new and unexpected destination. Buy it here

Everything Must Go! — (Short Story) Solomon is a young illegal immigrant living in London. Solomon spends his days in central London holding up a sign directing pedestrians towards a sale at a shop. Solomon does his best to blend into the crowds, however, when he finds a lost child he must decide between doing the right thing and protecting himself. Buy it here

The Cloud Ceiling — (Short story) Cali, a heavenly Muse must deal with her idiotic human, Zac Goldman. She must get him out of the pub and young ladies’ bedrooms to make him finish the epic novel that he unfortunately has in him. If Cali can’t get the job done, she will be demoted to a Muse’s Assistant and spend the rest of eternity helping the god-awful Poly inspire prayers.

Living the Dream (Feature Film) A small semi-pro football team from the UK become the national team for a small Pacific island — and find themselves playing in World Cup qualifiers on the other side of the world.

If you are thinking about taking time off work, quitting or simply putting pen to paper on an idea you have had, my advice is go for it. That being said, you have to prepare yourself for: self-doubt, financial hardship, creative blocks, derision as well as many other social pressures. Stick with it, you will never look back on this time and say ‘I wish I had spent less time pursuing my dream’.

Tom

If you want to get in touch regarding writing, your own story or anything at all find me on twitter @tomswritinglife or at thomashsavage@gmail.com

N.B In 2006 I was diagnosed with moderate dyslexia in my final year of university. What a blessing to finally understand that I was neither stupid nor less able than my peers. With a little help, a few tweaks here and there, I am able to produce what I want, when I want, how I want. I mention this only because from time-to-time (as this is self-edited) you may spot a spelling or grammatical error. This happens. I try, but at times I miss things, as we all do in life. What business does someone who can’t 100% edit a complex sentence have writing you may well ask? Well, unfortunately for me and perhaps you the reader, I have no choice. This is something I do, it’s not a profession yet; I think it might be a calling and I am not going to let a little thing like dyslexia or people who are really good at spelling and grammar (but not necessarily writing!) tell me otherwise.