I Was Shamed for My Looks While Living in a Fake Marriage

What I wish I knew about self-worth when I was younger

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The façade

Have you seen those Instagram reels of women proudly sharing pictures of places like Bali or the Bahamas, their husbands took them to? For many women watching, the highlight of their week might be going to the supermarket in the next town, and those reels just make them feel worse.

I used to be one half of such a couple who vacationed in fancy places, but the truth is, we were living a lie.

I can’t tell you how many times people would mention that we were the perfect couple. I won a minor beauty pageant at 18 and got married not long after that. Meanwhile, he, a doctor, hit the gym daily, come rain or shine.

The reality

But nobody knew the abuse that went on behind closed doors.

Every minor infarction, like a dish that was not to his taste, or an expenditure not preapproved by him, would be met with the foulest language, and sometimes he would destroy furniture to show me what he really wanted to do.

The tipping point was when I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, a chronic pain disease that virtually renders you bedridden.