The Depression That Wasn’t
Healing in a Misdiagnosed World
In life’s grand theater, I played the fool,
Lured by a siren’s song, breaking every rule.
A superior’s gaze, a forbidden dance,
I, already pledged, took a reckless chance.
Oh, the allure of attention long sought!
A lifetime of yearning, so easily bought.
But ’twas a mirage, a positional ploy,
My heart, once whole, became their toy.
Years invested in another, now undone,
“I’m not sure,” he said, our race never ran.
Two roads diverged, both leading astray,
For this folly, a steep price I’d pay.
Yet before these two, another one departed,
Leaving me broken and heavy-hearted.
I begged and pleaded, my soul laid bare,
But to deaf ears, a one-sided affair.
Rewind the clock, peel back the years,
To understand the source of these tears.
A spirit once high, in love with life,
Natural beauty, a balm for all strife.
Mountains whispered, rivers sang,
In every moment, joy’s bell rang.
Forgiving heart, a phoenix’s grace,
Rising from ashes, a smile on my face.
But did I truly let the past go?
Or did it fester, a silent undertow?
When pandemic’s shadow gripped the land,
My spirit faltered, unable to stand.
Trapped in solitude, mind a cage,
Sorrow and anxiety took center stage.
Hair falling, lips parched, soul depleted,
A body and mind thoroughly defeated.
“Depression,” the doctor swiftly declared,
A label too easily prepared.
I walked the path of grief’s five stages,
Sought recovery in self-help pages.
But revelation struck like lightning bright,
I’d been led astray, blinded to true light.
Not depression’s pit, but life’s harsh blows,
Had planted these seeds of woe.
Healing, not recovery, was my true need,
From life’s wounds, my soul to be freed.
Nutrients, sunlight, an active way,
To chase the shadows of doubt away.
Now I stand, a ray of sunshine bright,
A beacon of hope in the darkest night.
Social media sings of joy reclaimed,
A life of dreams, no longer constrained.
But reader, heed this hard-won truth,
Seek the real source of your life’s ruth.
Be it depression, loss, or temporary lows,
Find your path as awareness grows.
For in this journey, never-ending,
Of self-discovery and soul-mending,
Happiness awaits, a prize to seize,
For those who seek truth’s golden keys.
Author’s Note:
Sometimes, when we hear stories of depression and see once-happy people struggling, it can make us question our own mental state. The idea that anything — or even nothing concrete — can lead to depression can be unsettling. You might start to wonder if your own struggles and symptoms are signs of depression. And if a doctor labels you with it, why would you doubt it? After all, it can happen to anyone, right?
I spent months dealing with various symptoms that weakened both my mind and body, followed by months of trying to adhere to a doctor’s advice. Moving on from this experience has been challenging. Being wrongly diagnosed and spending around 1.5 years in this arduous process has taught me an important lesson: even the most learned and experienced professionals can make mistakes.
Life is tough, and relationships can make it tougher. It’s important not to fall into the trap of thinking you’re depressed just because some symptoms match. After months of back-and-forth sessions and extensive online research, I realized I was never depressed. I then spent time understanding myself better, identifying the real issues, and resolving them to escape the doom loop.
Awareness is crucial, but too much of it can lead to entrapment. Seek help from the right professionals, and if you’re not completely sure of their diagnosis, get a second opinion. Words like “depression” float so casually in our social conversations that we’ve forgotten their gravity. These are serious issues; don’t label yourself with one unless you’re completely sure.
Stay healthy and stay happy!
