The Doomed Pants Computer illustration by Louise Peacock

The Doomed Trousers — or Tabby Tilly Will Get a New Cat Bed

Patricia O'Neill
Catness
Published in
2 min readOct 3, 2023

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I don’t indulge in the craft of sewing in a massively prolific manner but I get in the mood to do so from time to time. I cut out some fabric to make a pair of grey casual trousers using half a pair of purchased pants that had seen better days as a pattern. My sewing machine developed a fault and I haven’t been able to take it in for repair yet so I sewed the slacks up by hand.

I don’t think the fact that they were hand sewn was the problem but when I decided to wear them the inside leg seam was decidedly wonky. I’d done something wrong but I don’t know what as I had used the antique pants leg as a pattern for an earlier pair of homemade trousers which worked out satisfactorily. I’d thought perhaps I might put a fake godet as an overlay on the pants leg to try and disguise the crooked seam but that idea has now gone out of the window.

I made a massive mistake by washing the wonky pants with some pink pants I’ve had for quite some time. I thought the pink pants were colourfast but long story short I was wrong. I now have a pair of pink and grey casual trousers. Oh alackaday!

Temporarily I’m using them as pyjama pants. I’ll probably unpick them and use them for something else. I’ve been thinking of making my cat a pet bed for some time (she has one but it doesn’t have ‘walls’ for the coldest winter nights). I’ll probably make a patchwork from the dismantled trousers to lay on the cat bed. I’ve never practised quilting so it will probably be somewhat Heath-Robinson. I don’t think the moggy[1] will complain as long as it’s comfortable and cosy. She did show interest while I was sewing them. My cat ignores toys that I have bought her but if I sew, crochet or knit she thinks the yarn is her plaything.

No choice but to pick myself up and start again. I realise now why some folk use a toile or a muslin (different names for the same thing — a mock-up of a sewing project).

It seems like the grey slacks were doomed from the start. Starting off with a seam that was askew and then finishing somewhat mottled after their first wash. Next time I make some trousers I’ll be using a trouser pattern. In fact I am in possession of a couple or three such patterns — I think I should have used one of them when I cut out my grey fabric.

Well, if we learn by our mistakes I should be VERY learned.

[1] British slang word for a cat.

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Patricia O'Neill
Catness

I'm a retired secretary. I've enjoyed writing as a hobby since childhood and decided to try my luck on Medium. Looking out for side hustles :).