Conflict Over Musical Styles in Worship

I have been no stranger to this topic of “Conflict Over Musical Styles in Worship”. Somewhere over the past few decades some churches that I served became embroiled in their personal preference in worship music. Some of the churches have “split” over what someone has called, “Worship Wars.”

As a worship pastor of many years, I have been called on to bring “peace” and “unity” to these volatile situations. I felt inadequate, unprepared, and had no training in dealing with “conflict resolution” of this kind. Therefore, I learned in the crucible by trial and error. With this in mind, I did learn some principles that did work and some that did not work. This is how I will approach this discussion.

In my opinion, the root cause in most cases was the decision to move to a more contemporary style of worship music from the “traditional style or blended style of worship that the church was currently doing. In most cases, this paradigm shift would be initiated by the Lead Pastor and other staff leadership, that wanted a more “relevant” style of worship music. Their concern was that the current style of worship music was hindering them from reach the younger generation. The mantra was we don’t need to lose the younger generation. A decision like this generally meant that the older members of the church would have to sacrifice their preferable music preferences. This decision was made in the name of “keeping the church relevant.”

Without going into the specifics of each style of music, the general shift would impact the older members of the congregation. They would bear the brunt of all the change and have to adjust from familiar hymn texts and songs that older people enjoyed, to something they were unfamiliar with. The older crowd would be introduced to new technology, such as the addition special lighting effects, and an all-new liturgy and service flow they were not familiar with. Unfortunately, many times they were not given enough explanation or preparation for all these changes. This older group have voiced their concerns to me many times by saying, “this doesn’t feel like my church anymore.”

Fear begins to set in, and a real sense of loss hits this older crowd. When the ingredients of “fear” “loss of control” become the prevailing emotion “anger” is not far behind. Why? Because these older people who had sacrificed so over the years to bring this church to where it is, were called upon to give up all their preferences in worship without any compromise. This older group felt like they were losing their history and heritage on what made their church great in past. To add insult to injury they were expected to keep paying their tithes and offerings to facilitate all this change, that they did not really want. Worst of all, they were not even consulted or given much information other than a change needed to transpire.

While the stories of each fellowship that I have consulted with or been a part of vary, the overall complaint was this. There was a real sense of loss. Tragic but true. We must facilitate change better as church leaders. From my experience I will offer a few suggestions on how to better handle “Facilitating Change” to avoid “Conflict Over Musical Styles in Worship.”

Things to Consider before making the change:

1. How long have you the leader been at the fellowship?

· Time = Trust — Yes, time equals trust! Have you spent enough time with the people that they know your heart and trust your judgment? This is a primary mistake I have seen many pastors make or worship pastor for that matter. It would be my suggestion that if you are new that you wait at least 1 year before making this kind of decision. Why might you ask? The people need to know that you love them and value their history and honor those who have paid a great price and sacrifice for this fellowship you are serving. You need time to know the DNA of the church, the community, and the city where you minister to make a change to their worship format.

2. How much time in prayer have you made about this change in Musical Style?

· Unity in the Holy Spirit –

· The lay leadership and congregation will know how much time you have spent in prayer by how you present your desire to see change in the musical style.

· Listen to what Paul said in his letter to the church in Philippi. Philippians — 2 So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, 2 complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind.[1]” Only the Holy Spirit can bring about this kind of unity. You can strive with all your and might and put as much sweat equity in your natural gifting as a leader, but you will not accomplish as much as you need to without the Holy Spirits empowerment. I would dare to say that with the Holy Spirits enablement you will see obstacles of opposing people move out the way because the Holy Spirit is ordering your steps.

3. What people group will be impacted the most by this change?

· Buy-in & Empathy!

· Most leaders, when they have a word from the Lord, feel like they must act upon it immediately. Assuming there is some level of conflict that you are dealing, and you have gone to the group most effected by the change, in most cases… they will appreciate you for caring enough to hear their concerns. and

· It takes courage to lead properly. Remind the opposers of the Philippians 2 passage we mention above. Assure them that you are striving for unity in the body and that Jesus is pleased when we are unified. Also, empathize with them and let them know you appreciate their sacrifice and that they are not forgotten. Offer tangible ideas and opportunities to meet their need for their kind of worship. Complement them on their flexibility and that they continue to continue to prefer one another in love. — Philippians 2: 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,[2]…’. Most conflicts can be resolved if all of the parties involved are willing to “prefer one another in love.”

5. What kind of timeline are you considering in making this large change?

· Walk don’t run!

· Proverbs 14:15 — “The simple believes everything, but the prudent gives thought to his steps.[3]” Jesus also talked about decision making when he said that no one would start building without first counting the costs? How much will this change in worship style cost you emotionally as a church?

· Proverbs 16:9 — “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps[4]” — God has called us to be shepherds and to love the flock that He has given us. Let’s make sure we are on His timeline and not on our own timeline of ambition.

Simple Strategies for dealing with “Conflict Over Musical Styles in Worship.”

If the conflict already exists, then move forward with these suggestions:

Do Nots:

1. Do not deal with the conflict from the pulpit.

· Bully pulpits drive wedges and don’t build harmony.

2. Do not shame them into submission.

· Guilting people into agreement doesn’t build trust; it opens the backdoor of church.

· Challenge them with the word of God, but don’t condemn them.

· Hebrews 13:17 — Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account.[5]

3. Do not forget to honor them sincerely.

· Honor reciprocates honor; If you give it you will receive it.

4. Proverbs 3: 35 — “The wise will inherit honor, but fools get disgrace. [6]”

Do’s:

1. Identify the “fire” of conflict is burning hottest!

· Proverbs 15:18 — “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention[7]”

· Proverbs 17:27 — “Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding[8]”

· Sometimes in ministry we are called to be “firemen”. We should put out the blaze first before we try to teach anybody anything.

2. Entreat the loudest critics first. Why?

· Matthew 18:15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.[9]

· 2 Timothy 2:24–26–23 Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. 24 And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, 25 correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will[10]”

· This is the best advice in dealing with critics! Paul had plenty of critics.

3. Determine how you will tangibly minister to this group with understanding.

· Don’t consider this compromise but showing reasonableness.

· Philippians 4: 5–6–4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again, I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand;[11]

4. Ask them for suggestions and for their flexibility.

· Sincerity and follow through will go long way in bringing your critics along.

5. Cast your vision on why this change will help build the churches future that they have sacrificed so much for.

· Proverbs 29:18 — “Where there is no prophetic vision the people cast off restraint[12]”

· Vision is not making decisions; it’s hearing from God and obeying His voice. People know the difference. Your critics will have to move out of the way when they see that God is going before you.

· Romans 8:31–32 -What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?[13]

I hope this helps you move forward in your conflict. Take it from one old worship warrior…God will see you through to victory.

[1] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Php 2:1–2.

[2] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Php 2:3–5.

[3] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 14:15.

[4] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 16:9.

[5] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Heb 13:17.

[6] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 3:35.

[7] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 15:18.

[8] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 17:27.

[9] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Mt 18:15.

[10] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), 2 Ti 2:23–26.

[11] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Php 4:4–5.

[12] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Pr 29:18.

[13] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Ro 8:31–32.