First-day jitters: A tale of stressing myself out for no good reason
As I work my way through the final semester of this nearly three-year journey, I find myself reflecting on how I felt the day I stepped into a classroom for the first time in 15 years.
Although I was excited to fulfill one of my life goals, I’ll admit, I was also completely stressed out by the idea of walking into a classroom full of people 20 years younger than me.
I remember arriving way too early and nervously sitting in my car waiting to walk in. As I sat there, I began worrying about every possible thing: Do people still use pencils and notepads, or have they been replaced by laptops and tablets? Will I be able to keep up with my fellow classmates? Am I too old to be back in school? Should I have colored my gray hair so I can fit in better?
It seems silly to worry about such things; I realize that now, but at the time, I was busy letting my anxiety take over all rational thought.
As the clock ticked closer to 10 a.m., I knew I had to leave the comfort of my car and face my fears head-on. I found my classroom, but no one was there. Immediately, my mind opened the gates to “stressville,” and I was once again flooded with anxiety. Questions swirled around in my head: Am I in the right building, the right room? Is this the correct day for class? Do I have the time wrong? How long should I sit here before leaving?
I knew I was early, so I walked around the hallway to calm my nerves. Soon, another student approached the door, and together we confirmed we were in the right place. The student said she had the same professor in the past and that he was usually late.
After a few minutes, several more students walked in — still no professor.
We sat quietly at first, but eventually struck up a conversation about the professor’s tardiness. It was an odd icebreaker, but an icebreaker nonetheless. We discovered that we were all communications majors and quickly connected over our similar interests.
As we shared our background stories, one of the students commented that he liked my hair. I joked about having earned every single one of my “wisdom highlights.” To my surprise, he said he thought I had purposefully colored my hair gray. I couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. I was clearly the oldest person in the room, so I figured I might as well embrace it.
I was finally beginning to feel at ease and settled into my seat just as the professor arrived frazzled and apologetic.
As it turned out, I had stressed myself out for no good reason. I realized everyone, including professors, has first-day jitters.
So, if you’re feeling nervous about your first day, just remember we’re all in the same boat. Relax and enjoy the ride!
