Horse Rings and Meddling Sisters
A comic-fantasy-fiction collaboration by Melina Saint Thunderdome and Indira Reddy

She opened the front door and there it was. A package addressed to her. A white box with a white satin bow. She opened the box. A ring made of sculptured horses looked back at her. She turned the box over and over, trying to find some more information. There was nothing. Frowning, she picked up the ring and put it on. It fit her perfectly. She walked back into the house. Her roommate was sitting on the couch, watching the news on her phone. The ring tightened around her finger and suddenly, a vision hit her like a truck at full speed.
“Purina, I’m having a vision, and it’s going on behind your back!” shouted Nelly, terrified.
“Borrrrrring!” Purina replied, “Be quiet. The news is on.”
“I’m serious,” said Nelly, the horse ring was beginning to throb, “You’re dressed as a pirate. You’re hobbling around on a peg leg, you’re wearing two eye patches, and you only have one tooth.”
Purina sighed, “Well, if you must know, I’m currently dealing with a really violent case of conjunctivitis in both my right and left eyes. And way to bring up my peg leg and lack of real teeth like this. You know I can’t afford modern prosthetics and dentistry!”
“I wish you could see what I’m seeing!” said Nelly excitedly, “Now you’re getting a tattoo that reads, ‘Arrrr! The lagoons be high, but the clams be low.’”
“Really? Cool!” Purina said. “What was in the box?”
“You’re a pirate and you’re asking me what I got in a box? Great priorities,” said Nelly.
“Are you still high from last night?” sighed Purina, “Forget about your silly visions and tell me what you got.”
“Hrmph. You don’t believe me. Here,” said Nelly, taking off the ring and handing it to Purina, “This is what I got. Try it on.”
Purina tried on the ring and a vision hits her smack in the face. She said, “You’re not going to believe this.”
Nelly replied, “I know. What do you see?”
“You look like a fancy-schmancy lady. Big dress and pearls. But you seem to be wheezing. And there’s an old man in a fancy waistcoat standing by. You’re coughing now and yuck! There’s blood and you fall down. The old man is laughing a strange laugh. You’re not moving. Ow! It’s suddenly very bright. Oh! You’re on stage. Nelly, you’re the star of the show. You’re getting up and everyone’s clapping for you, although you look like a vampire with that blood coming out. Urgh! You can have it back.”
Nelly stood frozen in fear. “This is going to sound really strange, but…” Nelly began.
“I don’t care, as long as it’s not boring,” Purina interrupted. “I stopped watching the news for this.”
Nelly continued with her thought, “…But when I was in preschool, I played the lead in the Shakespearean horror drama, Dracula Suckeths: A Non-Accurate Account As Told By Children.”
Purina gulped and suddenly became nervous, “I didn’t want to say this earlier, but one summer when I was 16, I decided to run away from home and become a pirate captain. So I stole a ski-doo and hoped to make a new life for myself on Lake Geneva. Unfortunately, the ski-doo capsized 12 feet from the shore.”
Nelly looked at the horse ring on her finger, “Purina, are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“If you’re thinking that it’s high time for a reboot of Dracula Suckeths, then yes, we’re thinking the same thing.”
“No! Focus here!” Nelly yelled impatiently, “This ring has some sort of power to see parts of our past. Let’s take it to my sister’s antique shop and ask her what she thinks of it.”
“Good idea,” said Purina, “But let’s walk. I’ve been sitting on the couch all day.”
Nelly and Purina entered Kelly’s Krazy Good Antiques. Kelly was sitting at the counter, dressed in all white — including a white wig and long white fingernails.
Nelly said, “Hi Kelly, someone sent me this ring and it gives me crazy visions.”
Purina nodded and piped in, “Me too. Basically, anyone who wears it.”
“That old thing?” said Kelly, “That’s Great-Aunt Tamara’s ring. I sent it to you. Why did you bring it back?”
Nelly gritted her teeth and replied, “Because, you idiot, you did not send a note or an address or any information with it. What else was I supposed to do?”
“Shh! Relax. Can I get you some chamomile tea?” replied Kelly.
“Stop shushing me,” said Nelly, “Why on earth did you give me one of your crazy pieces?”
Kelly said, “Relax. Please. I mean it. You’re disturbing the vibes of the place and if you don’t calm down my sleep potion will be spoiled. Please.”
“Just tell me why you gave me this stupid ring and…why now?” said Nelly.
Kelly said, “Oh Nelly. Don’t be so hard on the ring. He’s a bit of a drama-queen, but he’s loyal and faithful and — ”
Purina interrupted, “It’s just a ring.”
Kelly sighed and said, “This is what happened.”
Kelly took a deep breath to center herself, then blurted out, “Long story short: there’s a man trapped in the ring.”
“I’m going to need the long story,” said Nelly.
Purina stood looking at the antique store in amazement. “This place you’ve got here is fantastic! Are you hiring right now? I know nothing of antiques, but I’m a fast learner, I’m on time every day, and there is nothing more I love in life than PowerPoint presentations.”
Ignoring Purina, Kelly began to explain, “Great Aunt Tamara was the town sorceress. Unfortunately, she had what they liked to call ‘a fidget problem.’ She’d start a spell in her living room, and the next thing you know, she’s on the front porch giving herself an asymmetrical bang trim while dismantling the front porch. She’d forget all about finishing the spell.”
“I also have a ‘balls to the wall,’ ‘take no prisoners’ attitude toward customer service,” Purina added.
Ignoring Purina once again, Kelly continued with her explanation, “So one day she started a spell that was supposed to capture the spirit of a deceased loved one and place it into an object.”
“Kind of like a locket?” Nelly asked.
“Exactly,” replied Kelly, “So she chose to capture the spirit of her dead lover — Dr. Joseph Bell, PhD., the town’s remover of stray donkeys off of train rails — into a horse ring that he had given to her before his untimely death from being run over by a train.”
“I’m willing to work overtime at triple the pay rate,” added Purina, unaware that no one was listening to her talk about her lack of sellable skills.
“As usual, she botched up the spell. As you’ve already witnessed, the wearer of the ring has the ability to see distorted visions of other people’s past whenever the ring is worn. But I also think the spirit of Dr. Joseph Bell, PhD., is in it,” said Kelly.
Nelly had grown tired of waiting for the full explanation. “But why did you send it to me?!” she yelled, “I’m not into spells and potions and all that stuff.”
“Follow me to the back,” said Kelly, getting up from her seat and heading toward the backroom.
“One last question,” said Purina, “What is the employee policy on watching the news during work hours?”
They continued to ignore her and Purina continued to look around. Kelly and Nelly went into the back. Once inside, Kelly shut the door. Nelly asked, “Is it safe to leave her out there?”
Kelly shrugged and said, “I don’t keep the dangerous stuff in there.”
Nelly retorted, “No. You just give it to unsuspecting sisters.”
“I gave it you because only you can release that poor man from the spell.”
“Poor man??? You’re feeling sorry for the spirit?”
“Hold on. What happened was…Joseph’s wife, Emma had died before Joseph and Great-Aunt Tamara met, but that didn’t stop Emma from being jealous. She stuck around as a ghost and when Joseph died and his spirit went into the ring, she followed. Unknown to her, a pair of wisps were having a party in Emma’s ghost hair — her anger at Joseph had made it grow thick and long and it was perfect for hiding a pair of wisps who wanted to get frisky without announcing it to everyone. So, when Emma went into the ring, so did the wisps. They are the ones showing you the visions. They’re very naughty, but nice to talk to. They do have a warped sense of humour though.”
“What does all this have to do with me?” wailed Nelly, “Why did you have to send this menagerie to me?”
“Because only you can break the spell.”
Nelly gave her a stern look and started, “I’m losing my patience. Out with it or— “
“The reason it has to be you is that the spell can only be broken by a woman who is exactly thirty years of age…your birthday is tomorrow, right?…and she has to be celibate for a year…I know it’s been more than that, but that doesn’t matter…oh, and she has to have had a black cat, a brown dog and a blue fish and managed to lose or kill them accidentally.”
“That’s it. I’m out of here. I didn’t come here to be insulted. The dog and the cat ran away and the fish’s lifespan was over. And I am single by choice. Hrmph! You can have your ring back,” said Nelly and tried to take the ring off. But it wouldn’t come off.
Kelly said, “I’m sorry. Joseph won’t let you take the ring off, now that you know his story. Just break the spell and it will all be fine. I promise. Come, I’ll show you.”
Nelly’s shoulders dropped and she sighed.
Kelly handed Nelly a book the size of a dictionary, “Long story short: read this book.”
“I’m going to need the short story,” replied Nelly, through gritted teeth.
“Fine, fine,” said Kelly, “All you need to do is drag an entire church organ out to the middle of a cemetery at midnight tonight, then play AC/DC’s ‘Hell’s Bells.’”
“I can’t do any of that! I have no idea how to play an organ, let alone move one out of a church and into a cemetery. And I’m only familiar with AC/DC’s ‘You Shook Me All Night Long!’” yelled Nelly in frustration.
“Or,” Kelly said, annoyed that she was interrupted, “You can re-enact the pottery wheel scene from the movie ‘Ghost.’ Mom’s pottery studio is closing soon. You better move quickly!”
Nelly sighed. “Fine.” Grabbing her purse, Nelly yelled to Purina as she walked out the door, “Purina, I’ve got some clay to throw. I’ll meet you back at the apartment later.”
Purina responded from somewhere deep inside the bowels of the antique shop, “I’ll still be here, just looking around!”
“Kindly leave,” Kelly said, impatient with Purina.
Nelly stomped out of the store and started speed-walking. Purina exited the shop under Kelly’s glaring supervision. As she was leaving she shouted, “I’ll email you my resume.” Purina tried to follow Nelly, but she had disappeared.
Nelly reached her mother’s pottery studio, chest heaving with the exertion of walking over five blocks in heels. She stomped in. Her mother was lying on the futon, eyes closed, gently moving her arms in tune to the instrumental music that was coming through the speakers. Nelly’s mother opened one eye and said, “Shh! This is the best part.”
Nelly flopped down on the futon. She knew better than to disturb her mom at this point. Otherwise, she’d hear about it for years! She sat gritting her teeth. A few seconds later, her mom got up and snapped, “Well. You’ve spoilt the mood. What are you doing here anyway?”
Nelly replied, “Well, it’s all because of Kelly.”
“Why is it that you two girls cannot get along?”
“Get along? She gave me a cursed ring!”
“Cursed? Wow! What does it do?”
“Wow? It gives crazy visions.”
“You mean without drugs? Wow! Can I have it?”
“You…are…crazy. If I could take it off, I would gladly give it to you. But it won’t come off. And I need to use your pottery wheel thing.”
“Really? But you don’t like pottery. What do you want it for? Drop it on someone?”
“I need to recreate the scene from Ghost.”
“Ah! You’ve finally found someone! Tell me more about him. Although, if he’s so into a particular scene from a movie, I would be careful, you know.”
“There’s no one.”
Just then a tall guy wearing a floor length coat enters and said, “Hello. I’m looking for Nelly Partridge.”
“Are you sure you want Nelly?” asked the mother.
“Mom!” said Nelly, exasperated. She turned towards the guy and said, “Yes. I’m Nelly. I need to recreate the scene from Ghost.”
The man replied, “Uh. Just you and uh…your mother?”
“No. Just me. She’s leaving.”
“Oh, I’ll just be moving along,” said the mother, as she left out the front door. However, she was soon seen standing right outside the studio window, peering in like a stalker with eagle eyes.
Just then Nelly had a vision of the tall guy. Directly behind him, a scene appeared. The tall guy in the floor length coat became a tall guy in an all-white linen ensemble. He was leading a group of people in a chant, something that sounded vaguely like, Yesterday’s trash is tomorrow’s treasure. Nelly shook her head hard and the vision disappeared.
“So are you going to help me with the ‘Ghost’ scene or not?” questioned Nelly.
“Only if I get 50% off a studio session and all projects made within said studio session. Also, your sister asked me to give you this.” It was another white box with a white satin bow.
“Yes to the discount, and as for this,” said Nelly, grabbing the white box out of the man’s hands, “I don’t want more problems,” and threw the box in the trash.
The tall guy looked around uncomfortably. “So…I guess we should start…molding some clay. I’ll queue up ‘Unchained Melody’ by The Righteous Brothers.” The songs starts.
“Now this is when music was music!” yelled the mother from outside the window.
“First things first,” Nelly began, “I’ll need you to sit back approximately 10 feet behind me. And it’s best to not even look in my general direction.”
“Waaaaay ahead of you,” said the tall guy as he stood with his back against the wall. He was engrossed in his cell phone.
Taking a deep breath, Nelly turned on the pottery wheel and said, “Ok then, let’s do this.”
With the music blasting, the pottery wheel turning, and the tall guy not looking in her general direction, Nelly lost herself deep in a trance of wet clay. In what seemed like only a few seconds, the ring flew off Nelly’s hand and landed in the garbage bin.
“Wow, that was fast! It’s off!” cried Nelly excitedly.
“Hmmm? Oh, hey, great job. Can I go now?” asked the tall guy. “Your reception in here is terrible. Can’t a guy just watch the news on his cell phone without any interruptions?”
“You know…,” Nelly thought aloud, “You would be perfect for a friend of mine.”
“Oh hell no!” yelled the mother from outside the storefront window.
Melina and I collaborated on Google Docs. We each wrote five paragraphs…uh…sections…uh…okay, we each wrote five times, one after the other…I mean, I wrote something and she wrote and then I wrote back, until she ended it all with a screaming mother. What a great trip! I had tears in my eyes…no…I wasn’t cutting onions…I was just so happy!
Seriously, it was a lot of fun. Thank you very much Melina for doing this with me. To the funnies! 🍻
P.S. Yes. That’s the actual ring. But Joseph is not in it anymore. He says he wants big open spaces. He’s haunting a Pharaoh’s tomb now. The pharaoh seems happy to have a roommate after centuries of loneliness. People and their weird tastes!

