Ego is the Enemy in Dating

Ruth Burrowes
Change Becomes You
Published in
5 min readMar 22, 2024

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Photo by Mike Jones via Pexels

Frank told me point-blank on our first date that he “couldn’t offer [me] exclusivity.”

That should have been the end of it right there. I should have finished my drink, thanked him for the latte, and left the cafe without a backward glance.

But, of course, I didn’t.

Instead, I shrugged it off. It was a first date and I wasn’t even sure if I liked the guy. His speech about needing to “date around” after his semi-recent break-up felt very cliche and a little premature.

Relax, we’re just having coffee.

I remained calm and composed, nodding indifferently.

Okay, good. I just like to be upfront with these things because some girls get offended.

I rolled my eyes.

Here we go again.

I was about to get a speech about women getting too emotionally attached despite his warning. I’d hear similar sentiments so often I felt like I could give the speech for him.

It did make me curious though, what is the point of dating if you’re going to preface every romantic connection with an “I’m not really looking for anything serious”-type disclaimer?

We’d met at a ticketed 25+ New Year’s Eve single’s event. Surely, that implied “looking for something.”

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Ruth Burrowes
Change Becomes You

Sharing adventures and advice in dating, love, & relationships.