Change Becomes You
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Change Becomes You

Our Pink Bible Saved Our Marriage

Why Pink? It is her favorite color of course

Not long ago, a coworker asked me why I have a pink bible. Sheepishly, I admitted it was my wife’s and with a funny look they dropped the subject and we went back to doing what we were doing. I didn’t tell them why I carry it and they didn’t ask.

The truth is I never meant to carry a pink bible with me to work everyday. In fact, I have never been in the habit of carrying a bible of any color with me much of anywhere except to and from church. Even those church trips had not been as regular as they should have been in recent years. Well ahead of the pandemic, I had determined that 2020 would be a different year for me and I knew one of the places I wanted to start was my relationship with God. The other was my relationship with my wife.

It was with that in mind, I gave my wife a new pink bible with her name imprinted on it for Christmas and on Jan. 1, 2020, I highlighted a verse and wrote her a little note. This was 1.1.2020:

Ephesians 4: 22–24 “You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.”

I did not realize the impact it would have. For a couple of years prior, we had been sharing our faith and also our need to make God a priority in our lives. We both knew and wanted this, but yet the busy life of work, juggling five kids in a blended family, and all that goes with it just seemed to make finding time for God harder than it should be each day. I was failing in my role as a man, as a husband, and as a father. I wasn’t the spiritual leader they needed me to be and that failure impacted all of our lives.

That first short verse became a much larger step in our relationship and faith. It led to a time of prayer and my wife asked if I would find another one for us the next day. And the next. And the next. I am no bible expert, so the idea of finding a verse each day became somewhat of a challenge, but she seemed to like it and we both enjoyed our short quiet time together each evening. This was 2.3.20:

Colossians 4:2–3 “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains.”

After a month or so, a busy day came and went and the pink bible wasn’t opened and waiting for her that evening. It wasn’t intentional, but it was missed. Nothing much was said about the oversight, but we both could feel it and came to realize that a little daily time with God was changing our lives. He had become a part of us.

From that point on, I have tried very hard not to miss a day. I take the pink bible with me to work and some time before I go home each evening I have found a verse that speaks to me and I lay it out for her to read. It has made all the difference. Having a consistent habit that puts God and your spouse first may have saved my marriage. There is no doubt it made it better.

Fast forward a little over a year later. I have learned a lot more about the Bible, about my wife, and about myself. Just taking a little time each day to quietly reflect on God’s word and share it with someone is a very powerful growth experience and one that I wish I had completed years before. I found a few books and apps to help with theme or topics, but one of the things I learned most was that the Bible is not as complicated as many assume (or at least I did). There is a certain measure of romantic adventure, wrapped up with old fashioned good and evil.

Lots of tabs, lots of highlights, lots of love

I believe part of the power in faith is sharing it with someone else. God wants to have a relationship with each of us, but I believe he wants us to have relationships with those closest to us and also include him as well. Otherwise, what is potentially the best part of life never matures and grows into the purpose God intended. I spent a year carrying a pink bible to discover this and I am better for it everyday. Here was 12.31.20

Exodus 15:13 “In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling.”

I am no saint. I know plenty of people that read the bible every day and what is more important they act like. I did neither of these for a long time and I regret it terribly. If I have learned anything from reading the Bible everyday for a year, it is that God forgives. God heals. God has grace. Sometimes God uses the worst of us to do the best of things and he never leaves you. More than anything I learned that God is love and love is what makes a marriage. That and a little pink bible.

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Dr. Robert Thornell

Dr. Robert Thornell

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As a husband, father of five in a blended family, and an educator for 25+ years, I have seen, heard, and experienced a great life. I just love sharing ideas!