Perspective

I love the word perspective. It’s one of those words that sounds like it would mean exactly what it does. I know that may not make sense to you. But, I guess that speaks to the point I intend to make.

Perspective is defined as: a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view

Our attitudes are formed by our feelings. Our feelings derive from our experiences. Therefore, one’s perspective on anything, at any given time, is based solely on their own personal experiences.

Exhibit A: A racist

Person 1: Fuck them. They’re racist.

Person 2: Racism is taught. So fuck the person who taught them to be racist.

Person 3: Racism is taught. But, they’re old enough to know better. So fuck them and the person who taught them.

One racist, three people and three different perspectives. This isn’t about who is right or wrong. They’re all speaking their truth. Each of them sees the racist from their own point of view based on their own personal experiences.

The same can be said about everything in life. Whether it’s school, marriage, religion, etc. Everyone is seeing the world from their own perspective and everyone’s experiences are limited in some form or fashion.

This is especially important to remember when we make decisions about our own lives. We surround ourselves with people we love and respect. So when it comes time to make decisions that impact our lives. It’s hard not to value the opinions of those same people. You know these people love you and only want what’s best for you. So when they speak, you listen.

The trouble with this is, while their intentions are good. Those people are still only sharing their opinions about your choices from their own perspective. They’re telling you what they would do, what they can perceive, on what they think you could or should do.

This does not make them selfish. Even if their opinion of what you should do is beneficial to them. But what is true, is their opinion and perspective on the situation is limited to their own experiences. Whether the experiences are good or bad, it dictates how they feel about what you do. If someone experienced something similar and it was the worst time of their life. They will hold on to those feelings when advising you or giving their opinion. They cannot separate themselves and their own experiences from you and yours.

No matter how similar an occurrence may look or feel. Every situation is different because each individual is different.

So while we can love and respect the people we allow into our lives. We do not have to live with their perspective of the world. But, we do have to live with our own and the power lies in being able to make peace with those differences.

As Will Smith wrote is his latest book, WILL, “YOU and NOW are a unique occurrence, of which you are the most reliable measure of all the possibilities.”