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You don’t have to ‘transcend’. Just feel.
The Bypass of Healing
A reflection on real healing.
In spiritual circles, we’re often told that healing means staying positive, moving on, or finding the lesson. It’s comforting to think about it, a promise that if we just think the right thoughts, we’ll be okay. But what happens when those “positive” thoughts become a way to hide from what’s real? What happens when the language of healing turns into another mask we wear? I’ve been there.
I’ve told myself that “everything happens for a reason” when my world was falling apart. I’ve smiled through my pain because I thought that was strength. I’ve repeated affirmations I didn’t believe, hoping they’d fill the gaps inside me. And I’ve used spiritual ideas as a shield, thinking they were a sign of progress. But the truth is, those words didn’t heal me. They just silenced the storm in my chest for a while. They kept me from really feeling what needed to be felt.
The Comfort and Cost of Bypassing
It’s easy to see why we do this. Sitting in pain is hard. It’s messy, it’s vulnerable, and it doesn’t always fit into a neat spiritual narrative. So we reach for mantras and memes, telling ourselves that “everything is a lesson” and “good vibes only.”
