To Hell With Toxicity
Listen, not everybody likes it.
Sometimes, I just look at our generation and think to myself: “seriously?” Are we going to label this as socially acceptable? Will we continue to take pride in something so poisonous, especially in personal and romantic relationships? It doesn’t make sense and honestly, if you’re one of the people who carry this label like a badge of honor, stop it. Please. It’s NOT cute in any aspect. In case, you’ve been reading this for the past 15 seconds and wondering what I’m referring to, read for another 2 seconds and you’ll see. Taking pride in being toxic is NOT cute. Having toxic behavior is NOT cute. STOP.
“Toxic” is a word that’s been overly used in social media culture for awhile now, and sadly, there are a lot of people who wear it on their sleeves. We even prefer our romantic partners to have a “little toxicity” in them and all I do is palm the hell out of my face. It’s normalized and we all know it’s not the move. We watch too much TV. We watch too many celebrity couples. We idolize the wrong s***, instead of monitoring how we can be better versions of ourselves.
Luckily, you have me to (hopefully) to steer you in the right direction. To all that have been listening too much Future or City Girls that brings you to the point where your behavior has changed, I am here to let you know it’s not that cute. Sorry. Even if you don’t boast your toxic ways or unaware of how you act, I’m here for you. Here are some mindsets and behaviors that you may exhibit that could keep you from gaining friendships or companionship; and instead, being owners of 6 cats and 3 dogs because you suck at being a good human being.
Take Me as I Am.
I’ll start off by saying no. I will not take you as you are. Sometimes as humans, we think that none of the things we do don’t affect other people. We think our behaviors are completely fine when honestly, you may be affecting a lot of people that either want to be in your life or people that are in process of leaving it because you think your s*** doesn’t stink. If you are one of these people, ask yourself this one question: “Am I making the people in my life happy?” You’ll know the question by how your loved ones interact with you on a daily basis or not at all. Maybe they are fed up by the way that you act. We glorify being rude, disrespectful and narcissistic because we think being transparent equates to being weak. This is another reason why nobody wants you as a romantic partner. I don’t think anyone will continue to have patience for someone who doesn’t know how to respect themselves or their significant others. Eventually, love won’t keep anyone with you for long.
Why You Always Lying???
Ahhh, yes. The pathological liar. I’ve ran into a lot of these people. The ones who lie for absolutely no reason. The ones who lie and tell you the sky is red, when clearly all you see is blue. It’s sad to see and it’s because that these same people are either scared of conflict, don’t care who they hurt, or they want attention. The pathological liar does just enough to dissolve being provoked. It gets so bad where they believe their own lies. They’ll lie, lie, and lie some more to avoid consequences and accountability. One day, you will meet your match, and the right person won’t take constant lies as well as the past person did. I won’t say any more than that. The only thing with this is that someone can only encourage you to seek treatment. Or to do it yourself. We all mess up. We all don’t get things right the first, second, or third time around. That doesn’t mean that we have to continue to lie and hurt the people we love the most.
Always The Victim, Never the Offender.
We’ve always met someone who always plays the victim when they’re just as guilty. That ostentatious, extra- critical person that will always get scared when someone calls them out on BS. They’ll cry, tell Lifetime Network-style sob stories and say anything to validate their actions. Nothing they say will ever vindicate their ways, but it’s often adequate enough to confuse us from the actual problem and get us trapped up in their robust sentiments. It’s not cool to manipulate people in order for them to take your side and have them to feel sorry for you.
I’m sure it’s other behaviors, but these are the main ones I wanted to cover. If we are seriously ready to eliminate these mindsets and behaviors out of our lives, so be it. Be great. Make an effort to become a better individual. Stop hurting others in order to protect yourself from situations that will eventually come back to bite you. There’s a lot of smart people in the world that can spot your BS from a mile away. Sometimes, we’re just quiet about it. That alone should make you want to change your ways altogether.
-B.
