Transform Your Life in 5 Seconds…
It’s like working out for willpower by going to the emotional gym.
Negative thought spirals, anyone? Yes, me too at times. Way, way less than I used to though. Why? Because I became aware of the power of, and practised, directing my attention. Where attention goes energy flows and it can either go towards transforming us or keeping us trapped.
Picture the scene… Something happens in life we don’t like and it triggers us. We go, “Why does this keep happening to me?” then, “It’s my fault”, then “I’m not good enough” enter thought ladder and negative spiral. Then our body goes — that doesn’t feel nice, how can I get rid of that feeling? Hello, whole packet of biscuits devoured in one go, bottle of wine, gaming for hours, new shirt/dress or even something seemingly good for us, an extra hour at the gym working out. What if we could catch ourselves and divert our energy before needing an escape?
The game-changer here is becoming aware of when one or more of our saboteurs pipes up: The Controller, Hyper-achiever, being restless, The Stickler, People-pleaser, being hyper-vigilant, The Avoider, The Victim, or being hyper-rational. Choose your poison but learn to give it compassion at the same time. It’s not easy but it gets easier. My main ones are restlessness and avoidance. Feeling numb is the key to noticing the latter for me.
When you notice the negative voice/thought, I call mine Brain because it’s a fuc… messed up brain (at times), immediately countdown from 5,4,3,2,1, click your fingers, then bring your attention to your 5 senses in turn. Rub your fingers together and notice your fingerprints. How’s the temperature of the air going in and out of your nose? What’s close and far away you can hear? Can you still taste your last meal? Look at something in front of you in great detail.
Think of the above like going to the emotional gym and doing reps to gain emotional strength/willpower to divert the energy away from our overthinking minds and into your body — where the wisdom is. Our minds are like mirrors covered in the grease of our parental and societal conditioning which makes us unable to see/think clearly. We need support and strength to be able to snap out of spirals. With practise, exactly like building muscles in the physical gym, we get emotionally stronger and more confident to face tougher, more persistent, saboteurs.
Remember, 5,4,3,2,1 then, the 5 senses check in. Over time it’ll divert your energy and empower you to choose your next action instead of being victim to reacting. Being able to choose is the key to transforming our lives.
Let me know how you get on and, as always, thanks for reading.
With gratitude,
Adam (Follow me on IG @thevulnerabilityguy for more)
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Adam Slawson is a Transformational Coach, CEO, Author, Facilitator and Speaker. He: has guided Lululemon’s team in Transformational Inner Leadership, hosts the “Vulnerability In The City” radio show, facilitates workshops at multiple festivals inc. Boomtown and is regularly published in “Change Becomes You” writing about dating, relationships and emotional well-being. He believes “Our vulnerability is the catalyst to our freedom” and founded Plight Club clothing (www.plightclub.co.uk) to encourage this conversation. With over 22 years of experience, he coaches those who’d like to master their vulnerability to overcome anxiety, transform their relationships and gain magnetic confidence to attract the life that was meant for them instead of accepting the one they’ve been given.
His mission is to redefine vulnerability till it’s seen as the courageous act it is. His talks and offerings help people learn the language of emotions.
For more tools on tips to become better at expressing your emotions download his free e-guide here and/or visit his website here.
BOOK A FREE DISCOVERY CALL HERE
Photo by George Pagan III on Unsplash
