Are You Addicted to The Chase?
How To Curb Unhealthy Attractions and Find Comfort In Stability
Forever being the chaser is exhausting. Sure, there is a thrill attached to wanting to win someone’s affection but if it were really worth the prize, wouldn’t we all be happy and a little less lonely?
In short, the chase is rarely ever worth the effort as there is often a reason for it to begin with.
Maybe they’re in a relationship; are emotionally unavailable or maybe they’re just not into you — despite how each time you think of them you feel as if firecrackers are being set off in your stomach.
I recently went on a date with a great guy. It was relaxing and they were easy to talk to but I didn’t get that feeling of desire I’ve become so accustomed to over the years. Usually, I’d take this as a bad sign; that we were clearly incompatible with the connection not worth pursuing — but then I caught myself.
I’d fallen into my unavailable desire trap again. Searching for a feeling that often only comes up during times of overt longing — usually ignited by some version of unavailability.
Why is it that we can be naturally attracted to dynamics or situations that aren’t satisfying in the long run? We fall into the same traps of unavailable dating time after time…
