Be Calmer — You’re Not in Control, Accept It

Discover simple ways to reduce stress

Zen Michael
Oct 30 · 2 min read
Train passing by
Train passing by
Photo by Phil from Pexels

Most of the time we think we want to be able to control everything around us.

If we have a problem, a small or big one, we think we must have the power to solve it.

To be able to make sure things goes the direction we want it’s the only way we feel powerful.

But where does that take us? What do we do in those situations?

We rush to make decisions and when things do not result as expected we feel frustration.

We feel we were unable to deliver what was expected — expected from others or expected from ourselves.

Maybe we should consider rethinking this attitude.

The truth is that we are not the master of the universe, so we don’t have to control everything. And we also can’t do it, so it is much better to accept it once for all than to feel frustration.

We can only (maybe…) become masters of our own lives. And controlling (or being aware) of our thoughts, of our emotions, of our body, that’s already a huge task.

So, maybe we should start there — maybe that should become our main concern — instead of trying to control or change the entire world.

When we feel too agitated, when we feel too emotional, when we feel lost, if we rush to make decisions we will probably go in the wrong direction.

We end up making bad choices just because we feel that — in that type of situations — we have the obligation to do something.

In moments of great stress, instead of immediately trying to do something, the best attitude probably will be just to STOP.

In those situations, just try to stop for a while, take a deep breath, maybe close your eyes for one minute or two.

Then, look back into what is worrying you, into the situation you are facing, and consider the possibilities, what you can do about it (or not to do).

You may discover this practice, using these little moments of pause, can help you to see clearly, and assist you to choose wisely the direction you want to follow.

Remember you can always find peace and joy — just look inside yourself.

Change Your Mind Change Your Life

Read short and uplifting articles here to help you shift…

Sign up for Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

By Change Your Mind Change Your Life

Create an epic life with us - the latest in mind science, inspiration, spirituality, and health. Take a look

By signing up, you will create a Medium account if you don’t already have one. Review our Privacy Policy for more information about our privacy practices.

Check your inbox
Medium sent you an email at to complete your subscription.

Zen Michael

Written by

Happiness in on the Way, not at the end of the road. Calm, joy, meditation and creativity shape the Way. Don’t search for happiness and it may find you.

Change Your Mind Change Your Life

Read short and uplifting articles here to help you shift your thought, so you can see real change in your life and health.

Zen Michael

Written by

Happiness in on the Way, not at the end of the road. Calm, joy, meditation and creativity shape the Way. Don’t search for happiness and it may find you.

Change Your Mind Change Your Life

Read short and uplifting articles here to help you shift your thought, so you can see real change in your life and health.

Medium is an open platform where 170 million readers come to find insightful and dynamic thinking. Here, expert and undiscovered voices alike dive into the heart of any topic and bring new ideas to the surface. Learn more

Follow the writers, publications, and topics that matter to you, and you’ll see them on your homepage and in your inbox. Explore

If you have a story to tell, knowledge to share, or a perspective to offer — welcome home. It’s easy and free to post your thinking on any topic. Write on Medium

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store