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Disorganised Attachment and Fatalistic Love
We Crave Love, but Sense It’s Doomed
On some level, we all desire connection. Even those who avoid intimacy, like the avoidantly attached, still seek it out (to their own set of undesirable results).
We all have varying levels of desire for love, but I’d argue the disorganised attached to have the most existential, deep craving for it.
We want someone to fix us and to be the source of love we never received and give ourselves — and yet, we also fear and expect its downfall.
It’s a fatalistic viewpoint of love that we hold, something I recently expressed over on my Substack in a brief note about how I worry that I’ll “blow up” the romantic relationships I find myself in — and I wasn’t lying.
Whilst a part of me wants deep connection, another fears I’ll end up messing it all up.
As you can expect, going into relationships with this belief doesn’t end well. Relationships are built on foundations and a belief that you or someone else is inevitably going to cause it to fail is a shaky one, to say the least.
Today we’re talking about disorganised individuals and their (sometimes) fatalistic beliefs around love.
