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Insecure Dating: “What If I Can’t Find The Right Partner?”
You Can, You Just Need To Understand a Few Things First…
When pursuing secure relationships, many of us stay stuck in the same insecure relationships with the same types of people because we’re afraid to walk away when we should: when things don’t feel right, when they showing us yellow/red flags, and when we start chasing.
This fear is kept afloat by the belief that tells us we can’t or won’t get better. We’ll take what we can get, even if it means us pedestalling someone, shapeshifting our likes/dislikes & hobbies to be accepted by them, or lowering our boundaries to allow harmful or disrespectful behaviours towards us.
And it’s understandable why we might not believe we can find people who will love and accept us: Maybe all we’ve known in life are dynamics with unavailable people; maybe it’s what was modelled for us by our caregivers, or maybe it’s our age and societies expectations that are driving us.
In truth, it’s probably a mixture of all factors.
If we believe we can’t get better, this belief will have been solidified by our experiences to date, and the pressures we feel around us.
Until we choose better, and create new beliefs.
