Signs You’re Not Living Life Deliberately
Seize control over your life
Everyone can be considered to have a player build like in the NBA 2K video games. A player could be tall and lanky or short and stocky. A player could also be good at dribbling but not shooting, while the other could be good at passing but not rebounding.
Your player build may be something like a 6’4” male born in former Yugoslavia who plays basketball, prefers local food, and listens to local music. While there is nothing wrong, there may be a concern if all you indulge in has to do with the player build you were presented at birth.
There are signs that you are not living life deliberately, which are worth examining to see if you can seize control over your life to live better.
Signs of an Undeliberate Life
You still live in your hometown
You were born in a country that you probably grew to like most aspects of, from the culture to the weather. Decades into your life, you stay there because it’s your comfort zone. You feel valued by fellow citizens and also feel leaving your country is somehow treacherous.
The only true reason you stay in your country is probably because you were born there.
You don’t gaze at a map for hours in pursuit of a place that is the most fitting. Even if you do, you’re probably afraid to take the plunge by moving there and instead choose to be a weekend tourist.
You’re still monolingual
Even if you’re bilingual, your second language is probably English, which you chose out of necessity rather than sheer interest.
It’s common for people speaking foreign languages to feel that their personalities change. Also, languages can improve your brain.
Languages also have certain aspects that are bound to tweak your mentality. Sure, learning one new grammatical aspect is unlikely to change your life, but when such aspects pile up, the result can be profound.
Take formal speech in Russian. When you address others formally, you address them in plural, which is also common in other Slavic languages. This hints to how perceiving others in abundance is a sign of respect in such cultures.
You still believe in the same religion
If your religion is right, there are no arguments. However, there is a problem if your religion is the only religion you have investigated. In reality, it seems that many people have not even investigated their own religion.
It is common to come across Christians who haven’t fully read the Bible, Muslims who haven’t read the Quran, and so on. Yet, they stick to their beliefs without facing that their faith’s appeal lies in its familiarity.
You would be a much more deliberate Jew if you tried to objectively study other religions and then stuck to Judaism instead of simply following the faith because you haven’t studied anything else.
Your diet hasn’t changed
If your diet is fantastic, of course it shouldn’t change, but you can still change it on a small scale. For example, you can switch out white rice for brown rice.
What would be even more impressive is switching from being an omnivore to a vegan. That’s because such switches usually have to be very deliberate, but again, just like religion, you can stick to your original diet if you have objectively studied other diets and found them subpar.
You listen to mainstream music
Mainstream music is more scientific than you think. Artists cleverly craft their music to cater to the majority of listeners, and it’s the music you likely hear the most, so it’s easier to become interested in.
You don’t actively seek out other genres, and when they present themselves to you, you don’t give them the time of day. Nothing seems deliberate about your music taste.
You still watch television
A little bit of TV here and there can be good. It can alert you about content you never knew about. However, watching TV means you’re surrendering to what the TV wants you to watch instead of choosing what to watch.
TV is inefficient as it has its own schedule, it usually cannot be paused, and it’s jampacked with ads. Instead, many shows can be watched online whenever you like with pausing and rewinding available.
You’re still an employee
Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur, but as an employee, you are likelier to be a follower than a leader. Nothing screams “deliberate” more than being a leader.
You graduate from college and then seek the next person to work for. The premise is already laid out for you, and all you have to do is XYZ.
You seldom think about how the business you work for came to existence, and you constantly shy away from even thinking about starting your own business because of how deliberate it’d be. You would need to come up with an idea as well as how to execute and maintain it.
You don’t journal
Journaling is the epitome of being deliberate. You get to write about your day, making yourself more conscious of your actions, and you can also plan for the future, even if it is as simple as trying to make pizza tomorrow.
After a while, you can reread older entries in your diary and see if you have deliberately reconsidered your ways to improve them.
You can also hold yourself accountable by writing about bad choices you may have made. For example, you can write about binge watching TV for four hours today and planning to cut it out completely starting tomorrow.
Be Deliberate If You Want
It’s far too easy to jump on the bandwagon. If you’re happy with your life, no one should really interfere, but realize that you can study alternatives to what you’re doing and embrace them if they’re superior.
Start by thinking of one thing you do that most others in your country also do, and see if you can switch it with something better. Otherwise, stick to what you were doing if it remains worthwhile in comparison. At least what you were doing is now much more deliberate.
