Stopping the Self-Blame Game
Not everything is your fault, but thinking it is can sabotage you.
Why is it that some people sail through life without ever seeming to stress out about bad decisions they’ve made or incorrect actions they’ve taken or failed to take? What causes others default to blaming themselves every time something goes wrong? Is it possible for the second type of person to become more like the first?
Take Action to change your thinking pattern
If you recognize yourself as the second type, it is possible to improve your situation. There are steps you can take on your own, and you can also seek professional help.
After an appropriate time assessing the situation, it’s important to stop yourself from obsessing about it. Do what you have to in order to interrupt that negative mental loop. Go for a jog; anything to shake things up. Then figure out what you did wrong, decide how to prevent it in the future, apologize or do something to make up for it, if appropriate, and move on.
When I start blaming myself for something that happened, I try to look at it objectively because I know I have obsessive thought tendencies. First, I assess whether the event in question is a direct action by me or a direct action by someone else. If it’s a direct action by me, I ask myself…
