The Let Them Theory: Letting Go to Find Peace

How you can stop trying to control others

Diane Hatz
Change Your Mind Change Your Life

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(Photo by Renphoto from Getty Images Signature for Canva Pro)

The Let Them Theory is simple yet so profound. All it means is to let people be who they are. Let them have their own thoughts and opinions. Stop trying to control them. Let go, and let them be.

Practicing it might be more difficult than we realize, at least at first, but it’s a path to your own peace.

I recently watched a video from Mel Robbins where she talks in-depth about Let Them. The technique is basically the same as Letting Go and Surrender. It’s also the main prayer in 12 Step programs, said at the start and end of many meetings.

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

the courage to change the things I can,

and wisdom to know the difference.”

Our need to control others is what causes the most pain in our lives. It’s the root of most anxiety. The only thing we can change is ourselves.

Let Go Of the Oars

Another way to describe the Let Them Theory is the saying “let go of the oars.” I first heard the term during an Esther Hicks video. Others also use the term, including Mel Robbins. It means letting go and not controlling the currents of life.

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Diane Hatz
Change Your Mind Change Your Life

Author. Organizer. Inner activist. Looking for answers one pen stroke, meditation, and road trip at a time. Rock Gods & Messy Monsters out now.