The Next Time You’re Feeling Helpless Remember This
The mind will take you to the dark side if you let it
Have you experienced a helplessness so bad that the mind tells you: “yes it’s a good idea, end it and make this all go away. Go ahead, do it!”
I live in Japan a country with a high suicide rate. Every time the trains are delayed due to an “accident,” everyone knows what unfortunate incident happened. Someone ended their life by jumping onto the train tracks.
This is unfortunately so common here that people are indifferent to it. They are more flustered by the inconvenience train delays are causing them. Not for one moment do we empathize and wonder what sort of helplessness that person must have been feeling to take such a drastic action.
It breaks my heart because I know we all have been there at some point in our lives. Everyone’s mind is capable of going there to that dark place. This is why awareness of our thoughts or mindfulness is crucial in our day-to-day lives.
Make sure you control the mind before it controls you.
First — Know that you are not alone
When we feel helpless we often feel alone. Sometimes loneliness leads to a feeling helplessness because we may think no one else understands us or will understand our situation.
A simple Google search of your situation will show you that this is not the case. You will find endless discussion posts of others asking the same question.
Reddit, Quora and YouTube comments under relatable videos are all great ways to discover that there people out there who are experiencing or have experienced similar helplessness you are experiencing.
Sometimes it’s nice to see there are others who have come out of a desperate situation and you can too.
Second —Journal as much as you can
Sometimes we talk to a close friend or a family member endlessly about our problems. You may even wonder if the person is listening because they seem like they lost you after two minutes.
The hard truth is no one cares about our problems as much as we do. This is why it’s better to journal. Don’t get me wrong I have 5 hour Skype calls with my best friend in Canada pouring my heart out to her about my problems. I am not saying don’t do it at all. I’ll be a hypocrite if I did.
What I’m saying is that at the end of the day you have to be there for yourself first. Journaling is one of the best ways to do that because through journaling you get another perspective.
Also it’s important to remember another person won’t truly understand your situation because they aren’t experiencing exactly what you are going through. Even if the other person has experienced a similar situation it’s not exactly the same situation in the literal sense.
When you lay out your thoughts on paper while sitting with yourself, you’re able to think clearer about a problem and might even be able to see it from another perspective.
Lastly, the most important of all — Love yourself
Yes, that’s right it’s okay to look at yourself in the mirror and smile.
Not only is it okay but it’s important. The body and the mind are connected. When you behave in a manner of how you would if you’re feeling good such as smiling, standing up straight or even laughing then the mind gets fooled into believing you are feeling this way.
Talk to yourself and be your own best friend.
I learned this the hard way but it is truly the most important factor that has helped me crawl out of that hole.
It’s important to take time for yourself and use it to fuel your self love through self-care and self awareness.
For instance early this month I was being self-deprecating for being stuck in a financial rut. After spending a whole day in bed trying to sleep away the anxiousness I got up and told myself: “Sajeta it’s time to snap out of it. This is the situation now but what are you going to do about it? It’s not the end of the world. Just breathe. All is well. Everything is going to be okay.” — THIS HELPED!
Affirmations are great because they get fed into your subconscious mind and reprogram this old self-deprecating belief you may have of yourself. This is still ongoing for me and I know it’ll be a lifelong journey.
The more we talk to ourselves and repeat nice things to ourselves the more the critical negative thoughts become weakened until eventually it’s overpowered by all good thoughts and feelings.
Whenever you are feeling helpless remember you are not alone. A simple Google search just told me there are currently 7.8 billion people in the world. Do you think not one out of the 7.8 billion are feeling the way you are? Nope, that’s not true.
As the popular Buddha saying goes: life is suffering. Now with that knowledge what are you going to do about it? Life is never easy for anyone because we all have this complicated mind of ours to live with.
To get out of that feeling of helplessness you can journal to become more aware of your thoughts while practicing self love to not let the negative thoughts control you.
Journaling helps release all that tension you are feeling pertaining to your situation. Self-love will help you get out of any difficult situation because self-love will instill self-belief.
Believe in yourself to be your own superhero to overcome anything and everything life throws your way. The mind will take you to the dark side if you let it so before it does show it who’s the boss.