What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do?
Life can be humming along brilliantly when all of a sudden you reach a fork in the road, and a choice or decision is called for. Will you turn right or left? Will you say “yes” or “no?”
What if neither option feels like the right one, or you’re just unsure?
Like most people, you probably revisit your mind in hopes of hitting upon the “right” answer to the dilemma.
If that doesn’t bring a clear answer, you may ask for advice from friends and family. And what do they do? Promptly turn to their minds in hopes of delivering the answer you’re seeking.
Still don’t know what to do?
There is another choice, and one that’s much less likely to give you a big headache: leave your mind out of it for a while.
We spend most of our time in our minds, thinking, thinking, thinking. We’re so used to going to our minds for just about everything that of course we turn to our thoughts when we have a personal problem to be solved.
Here’s the thing: the mind is a limited tool. It can think, but it can’t feel. Feeling and intuition come from a different place.
When making a big decision, there’s usually a subtle “knowing” we can tap into that’s beyond mental knowing. This inner sense will serve us much better than our thoughts.
Have you ever hashed and rehashed a problem and come up with what seems to be a good solution, but then ignored that solution?
Some people are fans of making lists of pros and cons. That can work. But maybe you’ve made a list of pros and cons and still chosen the thing that had a much longer list of cons than pros. That’s because your inner feeling sense still won out despite all the “evidence” you had in front of you that it was a “bad” idea.
Maybe the results surprised you, and you later discovered some positive outcomes that you hadn’t even anticipated — and you were so glad you went with that choice.
Or maybe you found that your list of cons barely scratched the surface, and the outcome was far worse than you could have anticipated. Most of us have experienced both ends of this.
Ironically, even after thinking up a storm we don’t always opt for our best mind-given answers anyway, because life, fate, our innermost self, whatever you want to call it, wants a different course. And so, that’s the course we choose even as we wonder what the hell we’re doing that for.
Yes, we choose — or life propels us into — seemingly negative experiences sometimes. Maybe from deep within we know the situation will align us with our deepest desire to grow or develop in a certain way. Or maybe our innermost being just wants to experience something it has never experienced before, even if unpleasant. Just maybe?
Whatever the reason, we might unwittingly choose a difficult path because deep down something within us knows that’s exactly what’s needed.
The good news is, you can relax about that big decision and just let life live itself. Because that’s actually what it’s been doing all along, anyway.
Things usually resolve themselves naturally without much mental input or activity if we let them. Not always to our satisfaction, and not always like a fairytale ending, but to the satisfaction of life itself.
And who knows? Maybe that seemingly “bad” decision to go down one road is the very thing that slowly but eventually leads you to the road that scores you more love, money or fame than you could have imagined in your wildest dreams.
Or not. It was still the right move either way, because that’s how you were led.
When there’s a decision to be made the distress usually comes because we want a fast, instant, clear-cut solution — when really what’s needed is time and patience to let things make themselves clear or organically work themselves out.
All that’s really called for is to stand back and let everything unfold at its natural pace.
When we stay out of the mind and let life take its own course, what’s needed eventually unfolds.
It’s not always going to be a smooth, easy, bump-free process with made-to-order results.
But things will settle at some point, resolution will come and you will get through any challenges that arise. You always have up until this point, haven’t you?
Thanks so much for reading! If this article resonated with you, you may enjoy these poems I recently wrote: