Image by GrumpyBeere from Pixabay

When I Realized I Wasn’t Living, Just Existing

Existence is survival. Living is life.

--

Allen Saunders wrote,

“Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.”

This rings true for many of us. We plan and plan.

Yet, we often forget to live.

Each day, a mere repetition. A shadow of the one before.

We exist in a world full of life. But are we really part of it? It’s an irony, isn’t it?

We breathe, we function. But do we live?

My realization came quietly. Not a thunderous revelation. It was a gentle push. A whisper. Urging me towards something more.

A life beyond just existing. This journey is unique. It’s a path we all can walk.

Let’s take these steps together. Mindfully, one at a time.

Let’s begin the journey of living. Not just existing.

What does it mean to start living, not just existing?

“Existence is survival. Living is life.”

That’s a saying I once heard. It stuck with me.

Living versus existing. It’s a concept that’s both simple and profound.

Understand the essence. To start living is to awaken. It’s to engage with life actively. Not just pass through it. Existing is just survival. Living is thriving.

There’s a huge difference. It’s about choices. Deliberate and meaningful.

Existing is like being on autopilot. Living is taking the wheel.

Did you know most people spend less than 20% of their time on activities they truly enjoy?

That’s according to a global study. It’s a wake-up call. Time to switch gears.

To start living is to find joy. It’s to seek purpose. It’s to grow and evolve.

To exist is to remain static. Unchanging. Like stagnant water. Living is like a flowing river. Constantly moving. Renewing itself.

Helen Keller once said,

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”

That’s the essence of living. It’s about taking risks. Embracing adventure.

It’s about experiences. New and diverse. Living means breaking routines.

It’s about exploring. Discovering. Existing is staying in the comfort zone. Living is stepping out of it.

Think about your passions. Are you pursuing them? That’s a part of living.

Existing is ignoring them. It’s about letting life happen to you.

Living is making life happen. It’s about:

  • Creating.
  • Building.
  • Growing.

It’s taking control. Not just letting the days pass.

Each day should be unique. Not a repeat of the last.

To live is to connect. Deeply. With people. With nature. With yourself.

It’s about relationships. Meaningful and authentic. Existing is superficial connections.

Living is about depth. It’s about feeling. Experiencing emotions. Fully. Not just going through the motions.

Living is learning. Always.

Existing is being content with what you know.

It’s about curiosity. Exploration. Seeking knowledge. Existing is closing your mind. Living is opening it. Wide. To new ideas. New perspectives.

Oscar Wilde observed,

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”

That’s the challenge. To be among the rare. To choose to live. Not just exist.

It’s a decision. A commitment. To yourself. To the life you want to lead. Let’s make that choice. Today. To start living. Not just existing.

Tie your loose ends and seek help if you need it

“Unfinished business is like a thief in the night.”

We all have unresolved issues. They lurk in our lives. Like shadows. They sap our energy. Quietly. Persistently.

It’s these ‘loose ends’ that hold us back. They anchor us in the past.

Prevent us from fully living. Addressing them is crucial. It’s the first step towards freedom.

An average person spends about 90% of their time regretting the past or worrying about the future.

This leaves a mere 10% for the present. For living. That’s not enough.

We need to flip this ratio. To start, confront your past. Resolve what’s unresolved.

This might be emotional baggage. Financial troubles. Personal conflicts. They need attention. They demand resolution.

Les Brown advises,

“Ask for help, not because you are weak, but because you want to remain strong.”

Seeking help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength. It’s wisdom.

Professional help can be transformative. It might be therapy. Financial counseling. Career guidance.

Whatever it is, it’s a step towards resolution. It’s about taking control. Not letting the past dictate your present.

Honesty plays a big role here. Be honest with yourself. About your feelings. Your fears. Your dreams.

This honesty is liberating. It’s a foundation for genuine growth.

It leads to deeper connections. With others. With yourself. Existing is hiding behind a façade. Living is tearing it down.

Remember, you’re not alone. Everyone has their struggles. Their own ‘loose ends’.

Sharing your journey can be empowering. It can inspire others. It can create a support network.

A community of people striving to live, not just exist.

Tying up loose ends is a process. It’s ongoing. It requires patience. Perseverance.

But it’s worth it. It leads to a life of clarity. Of purpose. Of joy.

Let’s not let our unresolved issues define us. Let’s resolve them.

Let’s live fully. Not just exist.

Be honest with people

Thomas Jefferson once said,

“Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.”

This truth holds power. In our journey from existing to living. Honesty is key.

It’s not just about telling the truth. It’s about being true. To ourselves. To others. It’s about authenticity. In every interaction. Every relationship.

Research shows that the average person lies about 10 to 200 times a day.

These are often small, ‘white’ lies. But they add up.

They create a barrier.

Between us and the world. Between who we are and who we want to be.

Honesty breaks down these barriers. It’s a bridge. Connecting our inner world with the outer one.

Being honest is not always easy. It requires courage. It demands vulnerability. But it’s worth it.

It leads to deeper connections. More meaningful relationships.

It’s about removing the masks we wear. Revealing our true selves.

It’s a step towards living a genuine life. Not just existing in a facade.

Honesty is also about consistency. Your words and actions should align. That’s integrity.

It’s about being the same person. In public and in private.

It’s about being reliable. Trustworthy. People respect honesty. They gravitate towards it. It’s a magnet for genuine connections.

H. Jackson Brown Jr. advised,

“Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you.”

This is about setting an example. For those around us. Especially for the younger generation.

They learn from what they see. Not just what they’re told. We need to embody the values we teach.

Honesty also means being open about your needs. And your limitations. It’s okay to say ‘no’. To set boundaries.

This is crucial for mental health. For self-care. Existing is about pleasing others. Living is about respecting yourself. While respecting others.

In relationships, honesty fosters trust. It builds a strong foundation. It’s about being open. About your feelings. Your fears. Your dreams.

It’s about sharing your true self. This leads to stronger bonds. To love that is deep and authentic.

So, honesty is more than a virtue. It’s a way of life. It’s a path towards a more fulfilling existence.

Let’s embrace honesty. In our words. In our actions. In our lives. Let’s live truthfully. Authentically. Let’s not just exist. Let’s live with honesty.

Stop living within proximity

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”

Neale Donald Walsch wisely said. This quote is a beacon.

Guiding us away from mere existence. Toward a life lived fully.

Living within proximity is easy. It’s comfortable.

But it’s limiting. It’s staying within familiar boundaries. Not venturing beyond. It’s existing, not living.

Studies show that stepping out of your comfort zone enhances creativity and growth. Yet, most people avoid it.

They choose familiarity over the unknown. Comfort overgrowth. This is a trap. It’s a life lived in the shadows of potential. Not in its light.

Living fully means exploring. Beyond your immediate surroundings. It’s about new experiences.

They enrich us. Teach us. They shape our perspectives. Existing is repeating the same patterns.

Living is breaking them. It’s about embracing change. Seeking challenges. This is where growth happens.

It’s not just about physical proximity. It’s mental too.

We often limit our thoughts. Our beliefs. Our dreams. They stay within what’s ‘safe’.

But living means pushing these boundaries. It’s about dreaming big. Challenging your own beliefs. It’s about intellectual exploration.

The world is vast. Full of wonders. Full of opportunities.

Staying within a small circle means missing out.

On experiences. On people. On life.

It’s about saying ‘yes’ more often. To new opportunities. To new experiences. Even if they scare you.

T.S. Eliot once challenged,

“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”

This is the essence of living fully. It’s about taking risks. Not reckless ones. But calculated. Thoughtful. It’s about stretching your boundaries. Bit by bit.

So, stop living within proximity. Break free from the familiar.

Embrace the unknown. It’s out there. Waiting. Full of potential. Full of life.

Let’s not just exist in our comfort zones. Let’s live beyond them.

Let’s find out how far we can go.

Figure out what you want to do

Steve Jobs famously said,

“Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”

This powerful statement resonates deeply with our journey from existing to living.

Figuring out what you want to do is more than a career choice. It’s a fundamental step towards truly living.

This process involves deep self-reflection and honesty.

To begin, introspect on what ignites your spirit.

What activities make you feel most alive? It’s crucial to distinguish these from mere hobbies or fleeting interests.

As Oprah Winfrey wisely points out,

“Passion is energy.”

Notice what energizes you, what stirs your soul. This is the compass to guide you.

A study found that only 7% of people end up working in their dream job.

This reveals a widespread trend of complacency. Of settling for the safe path.

To break this cycle, we must dare to explore and identify our true calling.

Here’s a concise guide to help you figure out what you want to do:

  • Reflect on moments when you felt most fulfilled.
  • Identify activities where you lose track of time.
  • Think about the causes or issues you are most passionate about.
  • Assess your skills and how they align with your interests.
  • Contemplate what legacy you wish to leave behind.

Confucius’s words are a reminder of the joy that comes from aligning work with passion. He says,

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”

It’s about more than just making a living. It’s about making a life that resonates with your deepest values and aspirations.

This step is not about reckless abandonment of responsibilities, but about finding a balance.

It’s about blending passion with practicality. Not every passion translates directly into a career, but every career can be infused with passion.

It’s about making choices that bring you closer to your ideal life, one step at a time.

So, to move from existing to living, we must take the bold step of defining what we truly want to do.

This requires courage, honesty, and self-awareness.

It’s a journey toward a life of authenticity, fulfillment, and joy.

Let’s embrace this challenge and live, not just exist, in alignment with our true desires and passions.

Final thought

The journey from existing to living is deeply personal and varies from one individual to another.

It’s about finding your unique path and walking it with intention and purpose.

For me, it meant addressing unresolved issues, being honest with myself and others, stepping out of my comfort zone, and finally pursuing my passions.

It’s a continuous journey of self-discovery and growth.

Remember, we only get one life; it’s up to us to make it count.

Let’s not just exist, let’s live.

-Zohvib

Want more ideas?

Every Monday, I send out a newsletter with simple, practical tips for building emotional strength and resilience. Join here for free →

--

--