You Won’t Find Your Purpose By Asking Others
Self-work first, purpose next
Have you ever asked yourself questions such as…
- Why am I here?
- What’s my purpose on Earth?
Do you feel like you want to do something for the world, to give back in some way, but that where you find yourself in life often seems to prevent you from doing so?
I have come to believe that it’s natural for everyone to want to serve, to want to give back and that often, we find ourselves in places that seem to prevent us from doing it, at least with as much impact as we’d like to.
For some reason though, our decisions aren’t always the best when we haven’t given ourselves the time to reflect on who we are, the person we’d like to be, what energy we’d like to embody and represent but also — what our inclinations are, what interests us, what we’ve been through, and how we transformed.
I have for many years asked myself these questions; I always felt this urge to do something, to put my being to work, and sometimes, to do just that. But I want to do it in a direction that fulfills me. I want to exercise myself in a way that helps me grow as a human being.
Like many, I followed what was trending.
And while you can earn a living doing so, it may be fulfilling for those talking about it but not necessarily for you. Because at the end of the day, we are who we are, and to that person, specific interests matter more, whether or not they align with becoming a billionaire or running a humble shop.
Human beings are more complex in nature.
We don’t always fit.
Sometimes, we are a strange mix. But this mix is who we are. And part of our lessons here may be to learn to stand up for who we are. To try those unconventional routes, and zigzag for a little while because that’s how eclectic and eccentric our personality is, at least, how mine is.
I have looked at different options.
I asked plenty of questions. I consulted with some experts. And while I got a certain idea about the path I am to take in life, which I obviously correlated with my natural predispositions and interests — I also came to understand that there is an aspect of timing to it, and that really stepping onto our personal path does demand some self-work.
Often times, we are given certain environments that allow us some freedom. It could be a job that doesn’t pay really well but that does give us some free time compared to the average jobs. Others, we could get a well-paying job but one that also takes up more of our time. And so on.
Whatever our situation is, there is always some good to it. And the first step to reach the next milestone on our journey is to, at the very least, be grateful for what we have. When we are grateful, we are in a better state of mind, hence more productive.
In my opinion, there are always pros and cons to everything in life. Nothing is free. You want romance, get ready for some frustrating times. You want money, get ready for some shocks in your relationships. We are always doing better than someone, and vice-versa. Sometimes it’s better to detach from our narrow points of view, and simply look at the bigger picture (it means being pragmatic by the way.).
The point I’m trying to make here is that wherever we find ourselves in life, even when it doesn’t look like it, there are many gifts waiting to be discovered.
And one of them could be as little as one hour to thirty minutes a day fully invested in us.
It does not need to be crazy. It could start with something as simple as disconnecting from the daily noise, and breathing, allowing the mind to relax.
In time, naturally, this part of our day becomes our solace, and we look forward to it, adding newer dimensions to the experience by using a journal to write about ourselves and our experiences, or read books that bring us peace, and so on.
Giving ourselves some time on a daily basis is so necessary for personal growth yet, it sounds so strange to most people in this world, and that tells you a lot about this reality we’ve embodied in.
Personally, I find it comforting that I am the first step on my journey.
I love it. It seems to be an in-built mechanism of Existence.
The first step to you is you.
The more attention I give myself by rediscovering who I am, what interests me, what intrigues me, what I’m passionate about, what I can talk about forever — the more I learn about my path.
There is this beautiful quote I saw recently (synchronicity?) while pondering over these questions.
“Following your genuine intellectual curiosity is a better foundation for your career than following whatever is making money right now.”
— Naval Ravikant
And when we do it, we naturally eradicate lower vibrational states.
Not only does it make me happier, but overtime, as more and more of us approach our career with a grounded perspective — I believe the way we do business will also change. People will want to support each other.
Money will flow from one heart to another.
Honoring each step along the way is part of love too.
My mentor often told me in the past that everything I need is given to me in the now moment. I couldn’t get it. I won’t say that I totally do so now. But at least, it has started to make sense.
To get somewhere, I should at the very least do the best I can with what I have now. I have myself now. I have matters that trouble me. Why not start looking into it, and try to understand what’s happening?
As we experience this intimate journey with ourselves, we go through a transformation. And through this transformation, we begin to understand what we would like to give back to the world, what brings us joy, what gives meaning to our work.
In our very story is the work we want to do.
We like to look for answers outside ourselves but these answers have always been within. Only once they’re discovered within, does the outside help structure them in a way that allows us to connect with others.
I do not think we need to know everything in advance when it comes to our path. Personally, the more I try to “know” about it, the more confusing it gets.
Instead, one of the real joys of life comes from appreciating every step leading us to our unknown destination. I was rather intrigued the other day when I came across this beautiful picture (synchronicity?) that said:
“The man/person who loves walking will walk further than the man/person who loves the destination.”
— Sal Di Stefano
During the previous years, I have been more focused on the destination. It was all that mattered. The result was that it made me quite miserable. I didn’t give time to my family, nor enjoyed life’s simple moments and pleasures.
In my mind, I thought I was being the way a man should be in this day and age by always being serious, tense and seemingly focused when all I’ve experienced in return was burnout after burnout.
To me today, nothing is as important as the feeling of communion in my heart with all that is around me, and beyond. When there is work to be done, I’m more than glad to do it. But when it’s done. I’m back to my center.
How have your experiences with this subject been? Are you also thrilled to look inside yourself to find answers? Please, feel free to share your experiences with us!
Best.
