You know when the sun
Sets and you stare into oblivion and you wonder why you spend your time the way you do. You wonder why the only things you do are what you aren’t supposed to.
You wonder why you always get so far and then stop, why you can’t stick to anything or anyone. Love, undying lies somewhere atop the mountain. So I keep climbing, money cast aside, creations gaze is beautiful. So I stare at her, but creating involves forms and I let them slip from my hands.
Ephemeral highs, euphoric lows. No one was listening. Drugs, girls, the light fades away, as the candles extinguish, one at a time, the dreams leave the theatre of my mind and reality comes for it’s due. One can only play for so long, there is a part that clings on.
A time I held her hand and we watched the sunset, I felt the waves on my feet and she was everything, for a moment I was complete. Death wasn’t a fear, just one more step closer, one more step away from my humanity. I left it on the shore, with all the beautiful whores. It was just us, gardening, nothing could reach us. But the next day it was merely a dream, my devils had returned to my side for comfort.
One day maybe I’ll fall far enough that I can see the sky break and feel eternal light, but for now i’m caught in between, hooked on, chasing and running away, the pain I have inflicted because of these human thorns on my back. Reflected upon myself.
