Who I Care About
Someone once told me I cared too much and I could never figure out whether that was a good or bad thing. Maybe it’s both, I don’t know. But here’s what I do know: I know that I put a lot of love into the people in my life and as a result I am more whole.
The number of people I “know” does not have any real meaning. What matters are the people who understand me in ways that go beyond first impressions and light conversation. They are the ones who sit with you while you try to make sense of the world out loud. These are the people I devote my time to and they’re an important part of my life. It’s the meaningful relationships- the deeper conversations that I care about. It takes a lot of work: honesty, vulnerability, loyalty, compassion, and the simple act of being genuine. You can’t expect people to magically show up in your life and stay there. You need to care for them, because if you stick around long enough you’ll watch them care for you too.
I don’t need to talk to or see these people everyday. We understand that life gets busy and as time passes, keeping in touch becomes more difficult. I appreciate the relationships where we can pick up where we left off, with no resentment for the time or distance that kept us apart for so long. For me, all it takes are a few sincere conversations here and there to let you into my life.
Don’t mistake shallow and easy relationships for sincerity. In today’s world, it’s so easy to mix them up. I care for the face-to-face, heart-to-heart, awkward, occasionally difficult and real interactions. Social media keeps us connected but take a closer look at what’s connecting us; it feels like the only thing holding everyone together is a fragile piece of string.
I understand that people are hesitant to reach out to one another. We’re afraid that we might bother each other or scared they’ll think it’s strange you showed up one day out of the blue. This anxiety stops us from forming the connections that keep us fulfilled and happy. I occasionally have this same fear but then I remember how grateful I am when I hear from someone I haven’t heard from in a while; or how I often find myself wishing for people to understand that I am not easily bothered.
Be open to new people, but be wary as well. Not everyone has good intentions so don’t give your energy to those who don’t deserve it. You’ll figure out who’s honest and who’s not over time.
So my advice? Care. Just recklessly care about people the way you want them to care about you, and open up and be yourself because trust me, it will be worth it.
-Chelsea
